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Waymo Engineer's Disturbing Confession Highlights Ignorance At the Heart of the Self-Driving Lobby

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Just when you thought the self-driving car lobby was already drowning in its own Kool Aid, a Waymo engineer tweeted something very, very foolish. It's hilarious on its face, but it conceals a dark secret that isn't: The majority of those working on self-driving cars don't really understand what they're working on.

Let's start with the funny part.

On December 3rd of 2017, Waymo's Vahid Kazemi, a software engineer at Google's Research & Machine Intelligence Department, according to his LinkedIn profile, tweeted the following:

This guy sounds pretty damn dangerous. Someone needs to take away this guy's drivers license. Immediately.

There's a lot going on here—one could write a book about how wrong this is. Oh, wait. Someone already has. Several books, in fact. Among them is The Glass Cage, by Nicholas Carr. Then there's Fly By Wire, by William Langewiesche. Then there's Understanding Air France 447, by Bill Palmer. These three books cover the history of automation and autonomy, from the industrial revolution through modern aviation. If Kazemi had read any of them, he wouldn't have given us the most entertaining example to date of the ignorance at the core of the community actually developing self-driving cars.

How a man with a Ph.D. in Computer Science and Masters in Control & Robotics, working at Waymo—the company with the most advanced self-driving car program in the world—could be so ignorant staggers belief.

Based on my frequent visits to Silicon Valley and "Mobility" conferences around the world, he's not alone.

Let's break it down.

Kazemi, accustomed to what he describes as the "autonomous" features of his own car, rents one without them. As a result, he confesses that he "almost crashed ten times and ran over five people in two days." He then concludes that "humans aren't designed to drive cars!"

On its face this might be reasonable, except for who he is, what he should know, the language he uses, and the chasm-jumping logical leap justifying his career path.

Kazemi is obviously aware of Waymo's strategic decision to focus exclusively on Level 4 autonomous cars. Their decision was based on research indicating that semi-autonomous systems short of Level 4 led to atrophying skills. As cars march up the SAE/DOT Level definitions, drivers pay less attention—and place more faith in technology—than they should. Waymo's test drivers began falling asleep when using semi-autonomous systems, and were unresponsive to transition warnings alerting them to resume control. Studies have suggested that unprepared passengers might need as long as thirty seconds to do so, and Waymo concluded that no transition warning system would be sufficient to make a semi-autonomous car safe.

Waymo therefore decided to jump from Level 2/ADAS, which is where we are today, straight to R&D for Level 4.

Let's define some terms, for it appears that even people like Kazemi are confused. ADAS stands for Advanced Driver Assistance System, which defines a loose collection of safety technologies like radar/active cruise control (ACC), lane keeping (LKAS) and automatic emergency braking (AEB). Even if a car has such systems, their behavior varies from car to car, which can make it unwise to rely on theoretically similar systems one is unfamiliar with. Long-term reliance on any form of automation—even mild semi-autonomous systems—leads to atrophying skills. The more automation, and the more time spent using it, the worse the atrophy.

I think the SAE definitions are vague, but I'd argue that L2 starts when ADAS integration starts getting good, and that Tesla Autopilot was the first good L2 system—at least at the peak of its first generation, which ended with their schism with MobilEye.

Legally and technically, anything under Level 4 is semi-autonomous, and absolutely requires a human in the loop, because L2/ADAS can disengage anytime without warning. What about Level 3? All that adds is a transition warning system, which Waymo decided years ago couldn't be implemented safely.

Level 3 is so vague, hardly anyone wants to claim their system falls under the SAE definition. Even Cadillac's excellent SuperCruise doesn't claim Level 3.

Separately or together, no matter how many ADAS features you pack into a car, and no matter how well they work, I must repeat anything under Level 4 is semi-autonomous.

It is absolutely impossible to get a job at a real company working on this tech without knowing these definitions.

Or is it?

So, what were the "autonomous" features Kazemi was accustomed to that—when placed in a rental car lacking them—he nearly had 15 accidents over 48 hours? Does he regularly drive one of the two cars whose L2 is so good that they suggest full autonomy to the uneducated driver?

Not even close.

Here's what Kazemi bought in January 2016, according to his Facebook:

Yup. That's an Infiniti Q-series. Great car. How about that ADAS suite? It sounds like his is fully equipped, which means it's got everything listed here: ACC, LKAS and AEB.

How good is Infiniti's ADAS? Pretty good, but nowhere nearly as good as Tesla's Gen 1 or Cadillac's SuperCruise. There's a reason we never hear about Infiniti Autopilot accidents, a la Tesla. No one using the Infiniti thinks it's self-driving. It's ADAS is sooooo ADAS, Infiniti barely markets it at all, and they certainly don't bother playing Tesla's nomenclature game.

Kazemi must know this. Kazemi must understand this.

And yet he refers to these features as "autonomous."

Here's a guy working on L4 who doesn't seem to know or understand the nomenclature (let alone functionalities) of anything contiguous to what he's working on, and then he gets into a car with literally nothing, and nearly kills five people.

His conclusion? Humans aren't designed to drive cars. The reality? He shouldn't be driving cars, even with all the ADAS in his Infiniti. Drivers today remain legally responsible for anything that happens, no matter how many ADAS features they become accustomed to. If his skills are so atrophied that he—with all his education and purported knowledge of the sector—cannot muster the intellectual wherewithal to maintain safe control of a vehicle lacking ADAS, then he's a menace.

Waymo's Level 4 solution is perfect for him.

By conflating semi-autonomous features with actual autonomy, glossing over his own lack of skills and concluding that no one else could do better, Kazemi highlights the blinders-on mentality of too many in self-driving development.

Virtually everyone in the self-driving car sector—whether legacy car makers or startups—is focused on what's called series autonomy, which substitutes for human control rather than augments. An augmentation approach would follow the lessons of commercial aviation, where training and automation have proven incredibly successful in reducing fatalities.

Short of Level 4, parallel/augmented technology is the only way to make driving safer while eliminating incidents like Kazemi's. I wrote a whole article about augmentation earlier this year, and Toyota Research Institute boss Gil Pratt should be applauded for being the lone voice in the industry pushing for parallel solutions. TRI's Guardian is the answer to Kazemi's folly, and the antidote to the Kool Aid drinkers who think series is the only way to go.

Kazemi and crew would have us believe that 100+ years since the advent of the car, nothing can or should be done to make them safe under human control, that we can't learn how to master machines, that nothing is gained from doing so, and therefore no one should be driving at all.

I say he's wrong.

I want an uncrashable Porsche 911, if only they would design one exactly like this.

As for Kazemi, he pulled down his tweet. I can't wait for Waymo to give him the Wall-E pod he so needs, wants and deserves.

Alex Roy is Editor-at-Large for The Drive, Host of The Autonocast, co-host of /DRIVE on NBC Sports, author of The Driver and Founder of Noho Sound, has set numerous endurance driving records in Europe & the USA in the internal combustion, EV, 3-wheeler & Semi-Autonomous Classes, including the infamous Cannonball Run record. You can follow him on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.


Morgan 3-Wheeler Vs. OneWheel+ Electric Hoverboard: A Very Biased Comparison

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The list of cars "defeated" by my Cannonball record-setting Morgan 3-Wheeler is getting longer by the week: the Porsche 911, the Ford Mustang GT, the e-Moke, the Land Rover Series 1, the Vanderhall Venice, the G63 AMG, and the Land Rover Defender. Why do car manufacturers even bother? The answer is clear: They shouldn't, because they're foisting junk on a public tricked by numbers. Numbers, specs, details...no one cares. Real fun can't be quantified...which is why this week I've got a really special competitor. It's time for a Morgan 3-Wheeler vs. the OneWheel+ Hoverboard comparo.

What's a OneWheel+? It's an electric hoverboard with one wheel. It's got an app. It's made of wood, and it's got some metal in it. Millennials think hoverboards are cool, and it's sold by very hip stores like NYC's Filipacchi, who lent me theirs for this showdown.

What's the point? This: No one buys vehicles for the specs. If they do, they're wasting their time. The ownership experience isn't about talking points. At least, it shouldn't be. It's about driving pleasure, or in this case riding pleasure. When it comes to pleasure, specs are meaningless. NO ONE CARES. When you're riding or driving, it's all about you, and how the vehicle makes you feel.

By that standard, the Morgan 3-Wheeler is off the charts, and nothing I've tested comes close. Germany and Italy's best? All junk. But a OneWheel+? Junk obviously, but very, very, very cool. So cool, and so bizarre, that it actually is a worthy contender despite its wretched specs. Find out what happens when it faces off against the Morgan in the video below.

Alex Roy is Editor-at-Large for The Drive, Host of The Autonocast, co-host of /DRIVE on NBC Sports, author of The Driver and Founder of Noho Sound, has set numerous endurance driving records in Europe & the USA in the internal combustion, EV, 3-wheeler & Semi-Autonomous Classes, including the infamous Cannonball Run record. You can follow him on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.

Morgan 3-Wheeler Vs. Ferrari 458 Spider: A Very Biased Comparison

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No one buys a Ferrari street car, in spite of arguably being the pinnacle of automotive engineering, because of specs. What is the goal of all that technical prowess? It's not performance. It's not even talking points. It's intercourse. (Preferably not with yourself.)

This week on Morgan Versus, we put what I consider Ferrari's most recent misfire—one in a long line of errors—up against the world's very best/worst vehicle, my Morgan 3-wheeler. This week's victim? The Ferrari 458 Spider.

(Thank you to the Classic Car Club of Manhattan for providing the Ferrari. Ferrari never would have. Even if they would have, they certainly won't after watching this.)

What was Ferrari thinking? There are only two types of Ferraris: the ones that are cool, and the ones that aren't. The transition between cool and uncool occurred in 1984, with the last year the Berlinetta Boxer was produced, after which Italy's most famous marque turned to junk. They were junk before that, but they had the excuse of timeless designs that were good. Now everything is just tacky.

I know, I know. The Morgan 3-Wheeler is also junk, but it's perfect. Also perfect for reaching the owner's goal of intercourse, with another human, for free. Just look at it. It screams personality. The Ferrari does too, but not one attractive to anyone's target demographic, unless your target is underage boys. The Morgan will also make you friends. Single mothers. Soon-to-be single mothers. Soon-to-be mothers. Mechanics. Insurance adjusters. Everyone that matters.

Still not convinced? Watch the video anyway, because it's the one that will get me banned by Ferrari from events, junkets and press cars for the rest of my life. And deservedly so.

Alex Roy is Editor-at-Large for The Drive, Host of The Autonocast, co-host of /DRIVE on NBC Sports, author of The Driver and Founder of Noho Sound, has set numerous endurance driving records in Europe & the USA in the internal combustion, EV, 3-wheeler & Semi-Autonomous Classes, including the infamous Cannonball Run record. You can follow him on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.

This John Deere Tractor Engine Repair Toy Is Every Gearhead Kid's Dream Toy

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If you don't already know what you are getting the little guy (or girl) for the Holidays, may we recommend the Theo Klein Service Car Station or John Deere Tractor Engine. For those of you who dread the day your mechanically challenged offspring take to the road, why don't you start their learning curve early with this cool toy.

The toy comes complete with all the driveway fixes you would normally find yourself doing like changing the oil, changing the air filter, checking the dipstick, changing spark plugs and a few more. At just $120, your kid could troubleshoot vehicle issues before they even knows how to spell vehicle. Fortunately, the neat toy is powered by eight AA batteries so your kid won't come to the dinner table smelling like he (or she) rolled in oil just yet.

Once repairs are complete, your little offspring can turn the engine over and hear it rumble with a sense of satisfaction. If you think this is a solid gift, click the link to Amazon and purchase yours today. Plus, this is a great way to pull your little one away from the computer/tv/video game screen for a few hours.

Automotive Gifts for Weirdos

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The Pilgrims in Bethlehem invented Black Friday 3,000 years ago so that Americans would finally start embracing consumerism, or something. Let's honor their memory by keeping this joyous shopping tradition alive.

You probably have a good handle on what to get the norms in your life... socks and fancy cheese baskets... but here's a brief guide of auto-themed gifts for the creeps and weirdos you know.

Fancy Tire Thumper: Do you have a flamboyantly-attired friend in the long-haul trucking industry who spends countless days on the road hauling machine parts and dry goods while a silk top hat rests jauntily on his head? Of course you do. The dandy trucker in your life will never again suffer the indignity of having to conceal a plain and unstylish tire thumper under his bespoke velvet tailcoat once you get him this hand-crafted beauty from Vintage Gold's eBay store. Whether checking the air pressure on his rig's many wheels or turning a rapscallion's head into a fine red mist, this splendid tool will do the job so fast his monocle will pop out!

Rubber Tire Spikes: Crazy Uncle Mitch hates it when motorists use his driveway to turn around. It's vehicular trespassing! But shooting at their cars with rock salt just isn't fun since all those lawsuits. Put his misanthropic mind at ease with these realistic-looking rubber tire spikes. A couple of these on the end of a driveway will keep hooligans and ne'er-do-wells far away. Plus, they won't actually damage tires, so those mean big-city lawyers will finally leave him alone.

Comically Oversized Rims: Just because your elderly neighbor smells of cat urine and thinks you're her dead husband doesn't mean her beige Plymouth Reliant shouldn't rock some pimping rims. Treat her to a set of 26-inch chromed beauties worth far more than the car itself. She'll appreciate how much easier it is to get in and out, now that the driver's seat is an extra foot off the ground. Sure, braking and accelerating might suffer, but she only drives three miles per hour to that church down the block, so what's the harm?

This SR-71 Blackbird Cockpit Tour Is The Most Fascinating Thing You'll See All Week

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Yesterday I posted a picture on my personal Twitter account showing the Reconnaissance Systems Officer (RSO) "office" in Skunk Works boss Kelly Johnson's legendary creation, the SR-71 Blackbird. The photo intrigued many to say the least, and who could blame them? The rear cockpit in the "Sled" looks like something out of a Cold War era science fiction thriller, and in reality, it was just as cool.

Readers know I have written extensively on the SR-71, including articles about the jet's most spectacular flyover and air show maneuvers, among many other topics, and have even had guest posts on the subject, including one particularly amazing story told by a decorated Blackbird pilot himself. After seeing the picture, multiple people asked me to explain the different dials, screens, and buttons in the jet's busy cockpits. Luckily, instead of posting some third party account, I found a something way better—a complete tour of the jet's crew stations given by a guy who sat in the front seat while traveling at Mach 3.2 and 80,000 feet while MiGs circled below him.

SR-71 pilot, former 9th Strategic Reconnaissance Wing commander, and successful author Richard Graham gave the following in-depth video tour of the Blackbird's front and rear cockpits to aviation videographer Erik Johnston, and it's simply outstanding.

At first glance the SR-71's front cockpit may look somewhat conventional, but what you'll notice is that the small details Graham describes—like the periscope, laser horizon system, fuel transfer panel, liquid chemical engine start injectors and so on—are anything but.

The RSO had a more roomy work area, which featured controls for the aircraft's astro tracker navigation system, canvas curtains, and a wall of instrumentation. Oh and that thing that looks like a flip-down tray, it's actually the moving map projection screen, and under it is the SR-71's radar sensor display. Then there are the lights that tell the RSO to begin his ejection checklist, and then to eject should the pilot lose communications with him during an emergency. Intense stuff!

You can also see front and back SR-71 cockpit 360s by our friend Lyle Jansma and the National Museum Of The USAF by clicking here and here.

The video series also includes a tour of the J58 turbojet engine that powered the A-12 and SR-71 to amazing speeds and altitudes, and most importantly, an interview with Richard Graham about his experiences flying the Blackbird, and boy is it worth watching in full.

In it, Graham gives a ton of unique details about Blackbird operations. Some highlights including how the aircraft will become unrecoverable and will snap in half and disintegrate if it goes over 17 units of angle of attack. Or how they learned to taxi, takeoff, tank, and fly all around a hemisphere without ever speaking one word on the radio. As for the SR-71's still debated top speed, Graham says it was really Mach 3.4 and pilots were allowed to do 3.3 if doing so could possibly save their lives and the aircraft.

I can't overstate enough that this is a must watch video for any Blackbird enthusiast.

Contact the author: Tyler@thedrive.com

Dash Cam Review: BlackVue DR750S-2CH

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Plenty of videos online show scammers backing their cars into someone else's to get a payout, but having a dash camera would save any victim some trouble. I am not going to say you are going to catch the next Russian meteor, but many drivers have experienced incidents while driving that they wish they had footage of. Whether it is an erratic driver, an accident, or driving through hell, we always wish we had the footage.

Dash cameras can even double for track camera duty. BlackVue is a sponsor of Formula Drift, and every Formula Drift car is equipped with a BlackVue dash camera allowing fans to see streaming footage inside the cars. I tested out the BlackVue’s DR750S-2CH, and here's what I found.

The Camera

The BlackVue DR750S-2CH is BlackVue’s flagship product. It is a successor to their popular DR650S series. The DR750S-2CH features two 1080p cameras for both front and rear. It has many features that other dash cameras do not have. It features built-in impact and motion detection, Sony STARVIS sensors helping the camera product clear camera footage, built-in Wi-Fi and GPS, as well as an adaptive format-free file management system.

What You Get in the Box

  • Front 1080p 60 fps camera
  • Rear 1080p 30 fps camera
  • Quick-start guide
  • 12V car power cord
  • Double-sided tape for camera brackets
  • Cable Clips
  • 16 GB Micro SD card with included USB SD card reader
  • Rear camera connection cable
  • Plastic pry tool

Supplemental Software

Along with BlackVue dash cameras, the company offers two great ways to access your footage. For Android devices and iPhones, BlackVue offers the BlackVue App.

On Windows or Mac OS BlackVue offers the BlackVue Viewer. The BlackVue Viewer is extremely easy to use. I have dealt with a few track video applications which are not easy to use as the BlackVue Viewer is. The Viewer reminds me of the simplicity of Windows Movie Maker, but its simplicity isn't an indicator of quality. The viewer offers a log of all of the files on your SD card. When choosing and watching a video, you get detailed information such as driving speed, coordinates, date and time, as well as a little Google Map showing where at the point in the video you were on the road.

My Thoughts on the Camera

I think a problem with the dash camera market is it is very over saturated. There are tons of brands pushing their sub-par cameras and there is little brand recognition. I look at dash cameras the same way I look at any security cameras. Crimes are always being committed and they're caught on security cameras, but because the camera records in less than 480p you can't always make out much more than the fact that a figure committed a crime. I think BlackVue and the DR750S-2CH needs to be associated with dash cameras much like a Valentine ONE or an Escort MAX 360 is with radar detectors.

When I received the BlackVue, I knew it was not going to have a screen and I honestly did not know if it was a feature I wanted or not, but after using it for about a month, I can say dash cameras do not need screens. The front camera needs to point forward and the back camera needs to point backward. I understand that you may think you need to get the right view, but a screen for a one-time installation is pointless and convolutes your already busy passenger area. You may have an in car dash screen if you have a newer car for navigation and entertainment as well as possible radar detectors, adding screens you do not need. If you are still worried about pointing it to the right spot, the camera mount has grooved teeth that the camera slides into and locks with a button, but allows vertical up or down adjustment. I installed the BlackVue in my daily driven 2012 BMW E92 M3.

My commute to the office always seems to be when the sun is lowest in the sky, both in the morning and night, daylight savings time or not. I was worried that the dash camera that it would be recording glared video while driving into the sun with, making it difficult to make anything out from the footage. That was not the case. I am clearly able to see driving in the sun as well as driving in the shadows of bridges and tunnels without losing view on the video. I think that is where the Sony STARVIS sensors help out.

BlackVue not only helps you record things on your commute. They offer the BlackVue Power Magic Pro which is a device that helps limit battery drain allowing for the dash camera to record footage while parked.

Regarding the applications you get with the BlackVue-ecosystem, I find I do not use the phone application at all. I downloaded and used it to test of course, but I prefer just using the Windows application to view and export video. I must just be old school, if you like applications supplementing your hardware you will like the BlackVue application, it just is not for me. I am a pull the SD card out and look at it on the computer kind of guy, but luckily BlackVue has me covered on that front.

Price is always a concern with good hardware, but you pay the cost for the best. There are plenty of dub $100 dash cameras, but I am sure they will show you that a car was in front of you. Good luck for determining anything else. I kid, but you see the point, in most cases, quality levels go down with price. A BlackVue DR750S-2CH is going to run you just south of $400.

Regarding things I did not like, I would have preferred some sort of suction cup or rear view mirror mount. Instead it comes with some kind of adhesive gel to adhere the camera mount to your glass. I drive multiple vehicles and would prefer the ability to relocate the camera easily, but if you drive one car it would be no worry for you. I think my biggest gripe with the BlackVue is that having it, appears to make my car a magnet to having crazy stuff happen in front of me while driving.

View this post on Instagram

Tow truck tries to come into my lane

A post shared by Danny Korecki (@dkorecki) on Oct 28, 2017 at 5:50pm PDT

I hate numerical rating reviews, so I will simply say that the BlackVue DR750S-2CH is pricey, but worth it. It is a solid choice for a dash camera for your car. It checks all the boxes. It has a great ecosystem of applications and two high-quality cameras.

I will be creating a follow-up compilation video of all the crazy things I have caught on my dash camera over time and I will post it right here on The Drive. Stay tuned for that.

If you caught some cool footage with your BlackVue or any dash camera, put it in the comments below or the Facebook comments. I would love to check them out.

Watch the Drone Racing League Meet The Grand Tour to Blow Things Up

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The Drone Racing League (DRL) has come a long way in the past two years, from ramping up funding for its second season and setting a Guinness World Record for the fastest drone, to deciding on having its upcoming championship finale in Saudi Arabia. The DRL keeps pushing things forward. Most recently, it conceived of a bizarre and seriously fun competition called Drone Games, in which DRL meets Amazon’s The Grand Tour. What exactly does this newly invented challenge look like? Well, just picture various drone games, some car racing, and a healthy amount of explosions.

The DRL’s video quickly reminds viewers that everything presented is performed and commandeered by professionals, on closed courts, and that this should not be tried at home. It’s good advice, especially when you see how intense these drone games actually get. Fortunately, we can all sit back from the comforts of our homes and watch Amazon Prime’s The Grand Tour season 2 premier safely come December 8. It definitely looks like something to look forward to.

Let’s take a look.

The first game is called Cut and Run which is essentially the old Mario Kart Battle Mode challenge in which each team drives a car adorned with three balloons, and loses once the balloons are successfully picked off by the other team’s weaponry. In this case, of course, that weaponry is relegated entirely to an unmanned aerial vehicle and is piloted from within the opposing team's vehicle via first-person view goggles, just to add some extra nausea.

Game number two is Drone Darts, which is exactly what it sounds like, each team has to maneuver its drone over a building and slam it into a dartboard lying on the ground. The closer to the bullseye, the more points that drone attack is worth. Once again, FPV goggles are in play, here.

Next up is Corn Hole, which has each team frantically race its drones after a car with an open sunroof careening around an empty lot. The goal is to get as many drones into the moving vehicle as possible. Now, that may not sound as fun as some of the other games, so slightly stronger motivation was given to the pilots here. The winner of Corn Hole gets to blow up the losing team's car. I don’t know about you, but I suddenly just became a much better pilot.

Personally, drone racing itself isn't as enticing as a show like this seems to be. There's genuine camaraderie, a sense of mischief, and a good amount of creativity in developing these challenges on display. I'll absolutely be tuning in to this on December 8, and am curious where it will take this next.


Is the Entire Car Industry Really Doomed?

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Last week, Bob Lutz—former vice chairman and head of product development at GM, veteran of Ford, Chrysler, BMW & Opel, father of the Dodge Viper, and the automotive world’s most honest man—published a flamethrowing op-ed targeted titled “Kiss The Good Times Goodbye.” It echoes all the arguments of the Kool-Aid drinking mobility “experts” and everyone in Silicon Valley betting fortunes on the end of human driving as we know it. And not just human driving. Dealerships. Car magazines. Brands. If you believe Lutz, everything we know, love, or hate is utterly doomed by the arrival of self-driving cars.

Is Lutz right?

I’ve been saying the same thing as Lutz since 2015, with one crucial difference. I think it’s all over in 50-70 years. Lutz? Twenty.

That’s a big difference. If this had come from some idiot on LinkedIn whose bio said “Change Agent” or “Radical Disruptor,” I’d answer with customary wrath. But this is Bob Lutz, who delivers insight even when he misses the target. Also, the Dodge Viper wouldn’t exist without him. He’s a true car guy, and has nothing to gain by repeating the self-driving agenda. His argument deserves real analysis.

Let’s dissect this line-by-line.

KISS THE GOOD TIMES GOODBYE
“Everyone will have 5 years to get their car off the road or sell it for scrap”
By Bob Lutz

It saddens me to say it, but we are approaching the end of the automotive era.

To suggest the “automotive era” is over suggests a binary change, as if everything is going to flip, very, very quickly. Lutz is obviously a fan of Malcolm Gladwell’s The Tipping Point. I’d argue that we’re approaching the end of the beginning, which started with the Darpa Challenge back in 2007, and probably ended this week with Waymo’s announcement that they were removing the human monitors from their test vehicle fleet in Phoenix.

The auto industry is on an accelerating change curve. For hundreds of years, the horse was the prime mover of humans and for the past 120 years it has been the automobile.

Was the horse ever the prime mover of humans? Not for the humans who didn’t have horses. The horse metaphor is very popular, but it’s not really accurate. At peak horse, the majority of humans in the world had never owned, leased, financed or rented a horse, let alone ridden one. In the United States, cradle of car culture, peak horse occurred just over 100 years ago, when there were approximately 20 million horses in a human population of just over 100 million. Today there are approximately 323 million humans in the United States. Human driven cars? About 274 million, with an annual turnover of 17 million. The average vehicle's lifespan is 11.5 years. Even if 100% of cars sold starting tomorrow were capable of Level 4 self-driving, it would take 16 years to get to 100% ubiquity.

Sixteen years from today. And the tech doesn’t work yet except in limited conditions, even now. In fact, it doesn’t even work in limited conditions. Thank you, Navya.

A lot has to happen to meet Lutz’s timeline. A lot that technology can’t solve, which is human nature. Fortunes have been lost betting against it, and culture is as powerful as the tides. Both can shift, but nothing can force them.

Now we are approaching the end of the line for the automobile because travel will be in standardized modules.

Lutz is describing what I call the Autonomotive Singularity, which will manifest the day after the last person with the option of using a steering wheel chooses not to. Hold your horses, because Lutz is skipping over everything in between now and then. You know, the part where people still have choices. People like having agency over outcomes, or at least the sense of it. Human driven car sales are at an all-time high. Cars aren’t merely transportation, but transformation. People don’t just buy cars because they need to get from A to B, and even when they do, they’re willing to pay extra for personalization as an extension of self, which the zero-agency standardized module does little to address. Luxury pods? Sure, but those are statements of wealth. The id requires more. It requires agency and control over machines as a statement of power, and Lutz’s Wall-E scenario will be Kryptonite to anyone who can afford to avoid it. Right now, that’s everybody.

The end state will be the fully autonomous module with no capability for the driver to exercise command. You will call for it, it will arrive at your location, you'll get in, input your destination and go to the freeway.

This makes for perfect sense, after the multi-decade middle part, where people still have a choice.

On the freeway, it will merge seamlessly into a stream of other modules traveling at 120, 150 mph. The speed doesn't matter. You have a blending of rail-type with individual transportation.

This sounds great, but won’t work at those speeds until you have 100% ubiquity, which comes back to the issue of new vehicle turnover and mandating self-driving cars, which is going to be tough slog if safety is the argument, at least in the United States. Does anyone really care about safety? Nope. The USA isn’t one nation, but a collection of mini-nations with vastly different cultures. Check out drivers licensing standards and gun control laws. There’s your map of how easy it’s going to be to take away people’s steering wheels.

In or near major cities, nothing will be faster than driving yourself, or trains, until that 100% penetration occurs. Until then, all traffic will actually slow down, as the speed equilibrium slows to the slowest driver(s), which will be your self-driving cars.

Unless I have work to do, and even then, I’d rather drive myself around self-driving snails than sit in one while watching human drivers speed past.

Then, as you approach your exit, your module will enter deceleration lanes, exit and go to your final destination. You will be billed for the transportation. You will enter your credit card number or your thumbprint or whatever it will be then. The module will take off and go to its collection point, ready for the next person to call.

All true. which means, privacy will die. It's near death now.

Most of these standardized modules will be purchased and owned by the Ubers and Lyfts and God knows what other companies that will enter the transportation business in the future.

True, if Uber and Lyft survive long enough. Getting people into self-driving cars will probably require incentives before mandates. Incentives means dropping prices, unless there are government subsidies. Good luck with that. Cut prices further? How long can that last? There goes the Uber business plan. Remember Kozmo?

A minority of individuals may elect to have personalized modules sitting at home so they can leave their vacation stuff and the kids' soccer gear in them. They'll still want that convenience.

The vehicles, however, will no longer be driven by humans because in 15 to 20 years — at the latest — human-driven vehicles will be legislated off the highways.

So the wealthy will have personalized modules but the rest of us won’t? Methinks someone doesn’t hang out with normal people. Something tells me that Hurricanes Irma and Harvey set back the Lutz timeline another ten years. NO ONE who had to drive out of the flood zone will give up car ownership. No one. Demand? Meet supply.

As for the rich and their better pods, no one enjoys agency—and hoarding it—more than the rich. That’s why people buy extra cars they don’t drive. The first time a network failure or software crash disables Level 5 self-driving cars, Level 4 capable cars with steering wheels will become all the rage.

Steering wheels may be mandated away, but if they ever are, they will be mandated back in.

The tipping point will come when 20 to 30 percent of vehicles are fully autonomous. Countries will look at the accident statistics and figure out that human drivers are causing 99.9 percent of the accidents.

Tipping point? Puh-leez. Right now humans are causing 100% of car crashes and road fatalities. Guess what? No one cares. If anyone did, US licensing standards would match Germany’s. I repeat: no one cares, unless you lost a loved one in an accident. Sadly, 1.2M deaths a year out of a population of 7.4 billion doesn't move the global needle on mandating self-driving cars. Even the recent spike in US distracted driving deaths has failed to yield any movement on drivers ed, which is the cheapest way to mitigate such tragedies. Why? Because driver's ed isn't profitable.

REPEAT AFTER ME: SAFETY? NO ONE CARES.

Of course, there will be a transition period. Everyone will have five years to get their car off the road or sell it for scrap or trade it on a module.

Not in America. At least not for a long, long time.

What could work? Mandating Level 2/ADAS (Advanced Driver Assistance System) in every car. We’ll get there. And once we have, fatalities will drop, reducing pressure to get to Level 4, further delaying Lutz's timeline.

The Big Fleets

CNBC recently asked me to comment on a study showing that people don't want to buy an autonomous car because they would be scared of it. They don't trust traditional automakers, so the only autonomous car they'd buy would have to come from Apple or Google. Only then would they trust it.

Maybe, but people are irrational. They buy Maseratis, despite 40 years of Maserati, and everything Google can tell you about Maserati. They drive SUVs but won’t go to a Skip Barber driving class. They line up to buy iPhone Xs, whose UI is inferior to the 8. So safety ? trust ? want. I trust Hondas, but I don’t want one, at any price, nor does anyone I know who drives one. People just can’t get enough of crossovers with the same room as the better handling cars they’re derived from. Handling = safety, in the rational mind, but sitting higher up? Must be safer, right? Physics is a harsh mistress no driver wants to listen to, even after getting slapped.

Is trust in the theoretical safety of something more important than the id?

Obviously not.

My reply was that we don't need public acceptance of autonomous vehicles at first. All we need is acceptance by the big fleets: Uber, Lyft, FedEx, UPS, the U.S. Postal Service, utility companies, delivery services. Amazon will probably buy a slew of them. These fleet owners will account for several million vehicles a year. Every few months they will order 100,000 low-end modules, 100,000 medium and 100,000 high-end. The low-cost provider that delivers the specification will get the business.

This seems to make sense, except for all the other cars on the road.

These modules won't be branded Chevrolet, Ford or Toyota. They'll be branded Uber or Lyft or who-ever else is competing in the market.

Hmmm. Not sure about this. Who is buying these vehicles? Uber? Lyft? In what universe do they want to own these vehicles? What about third party fleets who make themselves available to Uber and Lyft on demand via fleet and traffic markets?

The manufacturers of the modules will be much like Nokia — basically building handsets. But that's not where the value is going to be in the future. The value is going to be captured by the companies with the fully autonomous fleets.

But someone has to buy those handsets, or people won’t have handsets.

What does “companies with the fully autonomous fleets mean”? Is it the transportation network companies (TNC’s) like Uber and Lyft? According to Reilly Brennan — editor of The Future of Transportation (one of the few relevant newsletters worth reading) and founder of Trucks.vc — whomever owns the customer’s payment information is in the power position. They don’t need to own the cars if Brennan is right, and they certainly don’t want to own the cars, so who does Lutz think will be in the power position?

The End Of Performance

These transportation companies will be able to order modules of various sizes — short ones, medium ones, long ones, even pickup modules. But the performance will be the same for all because nobody will be passing anybody else on the highway. That is the death knell for companies such as BMW, Mercedes-Benz and Audi. That kind of performance is not going to count anymore.

Absolutely true if/when human driving is outlawed. Good luck with that in Texas. Which automotive brands will survive? Read “The Autonomous Winter Is Coming.” I wrote it two years ago, and it’s even more true today. Lutz clearly isn’t familiar with Augmented Driving, or parallel autonomy, which is being developed by Toyota Research Institute (TRI). Inspired by aviation automation such as Airbus’ flight envelope protections, parallel systems like TRI’s Guardian resolve the conflict between Level 3/4 and the human need for agency by making human controlled vehicles uncrashable.

Make cool/fun cars uncrashable, and enthusiast brands will flourish rather than die. Anyone who's played Forza or Gran Turismo can see exactly who this would work in the real world. I love Lutz, but I bet he hasn't.

Strangely, it’s unclear whether BMW, Mercedes-Benz & Audi understand the distinction between parallel and series autonomy, which is where they all seem to be going, except Porsche. Series autonomy is a dead end no matter how well implemented, because it can never improve as fast human skill declines. Witness Tesla's Autopilot accidents, and theirs is the best such system on the road today. At least it was at the peak of it first generation.

Why is Toyota the only company to put a stake in the ground of the superior semi-autonomous path? There’s no reason Toyota should be first to announce a parallel solution other than due to foresight. That’s a lot of damn foresight. (Thank you, Gil Pratt.)

Porsche should own parallel autonomy. Come on, guys.

In each size vehicle, you will be able to order different equipment levels. There will be basic modules, and there will be luxury modules that will have a refrigerator, a TV and computer terminals with full connectivity. There will be no limit to what you can cram into these things because drinking while driving or texting while driving will no longer be an issue.

Because everyone loves small RV’s, right? Wrong. How many hi-end RV’s have you seen with a chauffeur? Nowhere outside of Business Insider videos. Does removing the chauffeur suddenly make RVs cool?

Not so much.

Lutz is partially right, as the latest New York Times self-driving issue points out in some hilarious short pieces about how autonomy is going to change transportation. It will, but it won’t change human nature.

You won’t be able to drive drunk. But you will be able to drive once Toyota gets Guardian on the road. Once they do, any car maker that wants their brand to survive will have to follow.

The importance of styling will be minimized because the modules in the high-speed trains will have to be blunt at both ends. There will be minimum separation in the train. Air resistance will be minimal because the modules will just be inserted into the train and spat out when you get close to your exit.

In no universe will this be true in this country, except in and near major downtown areas where all human driven vehicles are banned. That will likely require trillions in investment in infrastructure. Good luck with that, too. Assuming it happens, something else is coming: want to enter downtown Manhattan in 2050 in your Porsche 911? Your car won’t let you drive, but it will drive you there amongst all the other self-driving cars, until you choose to leave, at which point you can take over if you choose.

Sounds good to me. NYC traffic sucks. I'd love a car that drove me to where I could take over.

The Future of Dealers?

Unfortunately, I think this is the demise of automotive retailing as we know it.

Totally true, but only partially because of autonomy, and certainly before even partial penetration of self-driving cars. Subscription models like Cadillac Book will move the point of payment away from dealers and onto platforms owned by auto makers and new players, which dealers are not in any way ready for.

AutoNation is the first big exception; their alignment with Waymo suggests real foresight on both sides. Even if Lutz is right, AutoNation is now poised to pivot to a service model for all those self-driving cars. If he's half right, AutoNation gets paid from both sides.

Smaller players, or anyone late to the strategic partnership game? Dead.

Think about it: A horse dealer had a stable of horses of all ages, and you would come in and get the horse that suited you. You'd trade in your old horse and take your new horse home.

Traditional leasing, financing and rental models haven’t come close to this, and Ford’s experiment with shared leasing went nowhere. Again, human nature. People like owning things. They like sharing, but not necessarily at the expense of ownership.

Car dealers will continue to exist as a fringe business for people who want personalized modules or who buy reproduction vintage Ferraris or reproduction Formula 3 cars. Automotive sport — using the cars for fun — will survive, just not on public highways. It will survive in country clubs such as Monticello in New York and Autobahn in Joliet, Ill. It will be the well-to-do, to the amazement of all their friends, who still know how to drive and who will teach their kids how to drive. It is going to be an elitist thing, though there might be public tracks, like public golf courses, where you sign up for a certain car and you go over and have fun for a few hours.

And like racehorse breeders, there will be manufacturers of race cars and sports cars and off-road vehicles. But it will be a cottage industry.

I totally buy this, but not until after a long, multi-decade transition. Lutz basically describes the scenario from Rush’s Red Barchetta, itself based on a 1973 short story, which described a “Motor Law” banning cars as we know them. That sci-fi law was projected to go into effect about now. Or maybe it was last year. The best sci-fi is often conceptually right, but their timelines are off by 100%.

Yes, there will be dealers for this, but they will be few and far between. People will be unable to drive the car to the dealership, so dealers will probably all be on these motorsports and off-road dude ranches. It is there where people will be able to buy the car, drive it, get it serviced and get it repainted. In the early days, those tracks may be relatively numerous, but they will decline over time.

Lutz is totally right about this, except for the decline part. The more human driving is banned, the more racetracks will thrive as mechanical Disneylands.

So auto retailing will be OK for the next 10, maybe 15 years as the auto companies make autonomous vehicles that still carry the manufacturer's brand and are still on the highway.

Totally agree, but replace 10-15 with 30-50.

But dealerships are ultimately doomed.

YES, as we know them.

And I think Automotive News is doomed. Car and Driver is done; Road & Track is done. They are all facing a finite future. They'll be replaced by a magazine called Battery and Module read by the big fleets.

Half true. Automotive News will become Battery & Module. Car and Driver will survive because there will always be an enthusiast market — albeit smaller — and they’ve made some decent attempts to address autonomous tech in recent issues. Road & Track? Motor Trend? Dead. Upstart brands like Petrolicious will survive because they’re already focused on the best of the past, and need only expand their definition of classics year by year. Petrolicious may have to split into pre and post 2000 classics, but I think most of the cars sold between 2000 and Lutz’s tipping point will be unserviceable — the dark ages of electronics and all — but that’s another story.

The era of the human-driven automobile, its repair facilities, its dealerships, the media surrounding it — all will be gone in 20 years.

Fifty. And we’ll still need repair facilities. But they’ll be for modular replacements, and will most likely come from new companies whose infrastructure is radically different from current dealer models, who have no path to survival short of investing in automation and cheaper real estate in the next five years. As I said, Auto Nation will survive. (FYI, I have no stake in AutoNation.)

Today's automakers?
The companies that can move downstream and get into value creation will do OK. But unless they develop superior technical capability, the manufacturers of the modules, the handset providers, if you will, will have their specifications set by the big transportation companies.

Mostly yes.

The fleets will say, "We want a module of a certain length, a certain weight and a certain range."

Uh huh.

They will prescribe the mileage and the acceleration and take bids.

Transportation markets will be huge. So will traffic markets.

Automakers, if they are smart, may be able to adapt. General Motors sees the handwriting on the wall. It has created Maven and has bought into Cruise Automation and Lyft.

We’ll see. #SelfDrivingTheater is the new security theater. There’s no real evidence GM is any smarter than Daimler, Ford or Toyota, all big players who’ve also invested fortunes as a hedge against Lutz’s argument. Still, all of them blew it relative to Waymo, who just removed the safety engineers from the driver’s seats in their Phoenix deployment.

[GM] doesn't want to be the handset provider. It wants to be the company that creates the value and captures the value, and it is making the right moves to be around when the transition occurs. I think probably everybody sees it coming, but no one wants to talk about it. They know they will be OK for a few years if they keep providing superior technology, superior design and have good software for autonomous driving.

Everyone wants to be that company, and no one sees a clear path forward. At this point it’s unclear whether Uber or even Lyft will survive as independent companies. If and when one or both are acquired, a buyer that can combine manufacturing with a TNC platform is guaranteed to become dominant under their legacy brand, which upends Lutz’s argument.

So for a while, the autonomous thing will be captured by the automobile companies. But then it's going to flip, and the value will be captured by the big fleets.

Again, unless the fleet companies are acquired by manufacturers.

This transition will be largely complete in 20 years.

Not without mandates. This might work in fairly homogenous, socialist states where local culture aligns with broader goals, say, Norway or Sweden. American red states? Guns are the only thing people take more seriously. In this country, the suggestion that people won’t fight to retain control — and by that I mean ownership — is absurd. Lutz’s prediction requires a tough political slog. Anyone pushing to mandate self-driving cars will see the left and right subdivide, coalesce and unite around the concept of ownership of motion, which conflicts with utopian visions of “mobility”, which is no better than code for turning transportation into health insurance.

In America, that's not a good thing.

I won't be around to say, "I told you so," though if I do make it to 105, I could no longer drive anyway because driving will be banned. So my timing once again is impeccable.

Actually, Lutz will be around to see some of this happen. Just not here in the United States.

In the meantime, I can’t wait for a future aftermarket shop to do a restomod of a Gen 1 Dodge Viper, but add the awesome parallel/augmented driving tech I predict will set back Lutz’s timeline by decades, and make driving great again. Those Vipers were awesome, clunky and dangerous. God bless them all, and Lutz, and whomever can build an uncrashable Viper before he dies.

“On a long enough timeline,” according to Fight Club, “the survival rate of everyone drops to zero.”

Now change “everyone” to “everything”.

By that standard, Lutz is right and wrong, by half. As in half a century.

Alex Roy is Editor-at-Large for The Drive, Host of The Autonocast, co-host of /DRIVE on NBC Sports, author of The Driver and Founder of Noho Sound, has set numerous endurance driving records in Europe & the USA in the internal combustion, EV, 3-wheeler & Semi-Autonomous Classes, including the infamous Cannonball Run record. You can follow him on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.

The Truth Behind Doug DeMuro's Tesla Model 3 Review

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You’ve got to hand it to broken clocks. So reliable. You know exactly when they work. Take Doug DeMuro. He’ll do whatever it takes for traffic. Facts? Figures? Doesn’t matter. Whatever it takes for traffic. Let him near a Tesla and the weathervane of clickbait writes the story. Everyone loves the Model S? DeMuro will hate it. Tesla taking a bath in the media? Let’s do a Model 3 review and call it awesome.

Of course the Model 3 is awesome, but DeMuro is too right by half, and misses the real story.

Rather than take advantage of a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to do real journalism, DeMuro applies the usual aw shucks routine to one of the most important cars since the Ford Model T, a car that may transcend the ability of the current generation of auto media to review it. That DeMuro loves it conceals the truth, which is that he became an unwitting pawn in a much bigger game: Tesla’s asymmetric war on the auto industry.

All those Tesla shorts harping on production issues, firings, and the minutiae of the house of Musk? Like DeMuro, they're missing the big picture. Even if everything the trolls say is true, Tesla is too big to fail. I don’t mean the company. I mean the brand, which is the company.

In an increasingly commoditized world, brand is everything. By that standard, Tesla has already won. Every Model 3 would literally have to explode on opening the door for the brand to take a hit, and even then it probably wouldn’t matter. Tesla holds too many cards—good, bad and unknown—to lose. What is “winning” and “losing” for a poker player as good as Elon Musk, who can afford to come back to the table over and over? As long as the Model 3 is halfway decent—and it's clearly far better than that—Tesla will survive. Its structure, operations, and partnerships may change, but it's here to stay, and its survival is about much more than car reviews, or even cars.

To understand why, we have to do a real review of the Tesla Model 3, which must start far, far outside the car itself.

[Disclaimer: I don’t own any $TSLA. I derive no material or financial benefit from my Tesla coverage other than a fixed paycheck from Time, Inc., who have generously granted me carte blanche in my writing. As for the whores, shills, and trolls, no comment other than my obvious contempt for most on both sides.]

Why There Aren’t Real Model 3 Reviews

In what universe does a useful idiot like Doug DeMuro become the first (ahem) automotive journalist to review a Tesla Model 3? One in which Tesla has kept—to the best of its brobdingnagian ability—ironclad control over who, where, when, and how anyone gets to drive one—and that includes the cars “sold” to employees. The launch event earlier this year, where the media got a two-minute ride through a darkened parking lot in Hawthorne? I was there. The New York City Philharmonic doesn’t have orchestration like that. We all know Teslas are fast. A lighter, more aerodynamic Tesla is going to be even faster.

Abre los ojos, mis agimos. The people behind what passes for automotive “journalism” can’t get their hands on a Model 3 without a Tesla employee coming along. Road & Track recently tweeted asking any employee “owners” if they would lend that venerable publication a car. No luck, apparently. What about about Motor Trend’s recent, brief drive in the hills above Los Angeles? “It’s great,” they said, or something like that. Of course it is. No mention of the compartment-facing camera above the rearview mirror. When legacy auto media misses things like that, we need new media.

What is Tesla hiding? Little about the car, everything about their strategy. Actually, I take that back: you have to be blind not to see what’s going on with the Model 3. We’ve already seen 90 percent of it in the Model S. The rest can be assembled from fractured coverage and Instagram. Every nugget of Model 3 information is another facet of the brilliant jewel that is the Tesla narrative. That last 1 percent? We’ll get to that.

But first, the recent spate of unofficial reviews. First there was the video from a wrap shop in California. Then there was an hour long video from the Tesla Model 3 Owners Club.

No explosions. Tesla wins.

Then I started getting e-mails. People who work for Tesla. People who don’t work for Tesla. Were they real? How to know for sure? Ride in my Model 3. Drive my Model 3. Some let me look at the car. Ride, and drive? Yes, and no. Proof? Pictures and video? Not as much as I would have liked. What was going on? Anyone who doesn’t think Tesla is the Apple of transportation is crazy. It's duplicating the psychology of needs/wants perfectly. Replace Maslow with Tesla and you have the modern era’s hierarchy of needs. I’m no conspiracy theorist, but one has to marvel at the unfolding of the world’s greatest public relations plan, which is only partially by design. If Tesla truly controls as much of the information flow as its enemies believe and fear, everyone in its communications department deserves a raise and a long-term contract. If not, Tesla is riding a perfect storm of tech, communications, rumor, jealousy, and lust.

Sow the wind, reap the whirlwind.

I’ve been sitting on my review for weeks. Why? Because none of my time with the Model 3 gave me what I needed, nor what anyone really wants to know: are the shorts right, or wrong?

And then DeMuro published his video, removing any concerns I had about having incomplete information—let alone content—which completely abrió mis ojos.

Was DeMuro’s review car actually an employee “owner” car? Who cares? He loved it. Tesla wins.

Innovation Versus Innovation

If you want to understand the Model 3, read retired auto exec and hobbyist bomb-thrower Bob Lutz’s screed on the future of the auto sector. He thinks dealerships, car magazines, legacy auto makers, and human driving have 20 years left. I think it’ll go quicker than that for some, slower for others.

One thing is certain: When the auto sector as we know it is annihilated, it will be because of the Model 3. Based on what I experienced, everything in the Model 3 will be duplicated by everyone else, except for the public relations and mythology, which no automaker outside of the hypercar circles understand.

The genius of the Model 3 is the inversion of expectations and total break from the past. Its only forebear is the Model S. Spiritually, maybe even the Citroën DS. Every design “flaw” is a feature, not a defect. One can’t compare the Model 3 to anything else on the market, because Tesla is selling an idea—albeit one with functionalities attached.

The only fair comparison? The old vs. the new. When legacy carmakers talk about innovation, they’re merely packaging “innovation” they buy off the shelf from the same Tier 1 suppliers as everyone across town. Bo-RING. Sometimes they do something really interesting, like Cadillac or Audi, but mostly it’s the same shtick.

Innovation is all or nothing. No matter how much “innovation” customers think they’ve bought, the next five generations of customers aren’t going to put up with a car, at any price, that has Bluetooth and infotainment inferior to their latest phone.

Tesla speaks directly to these so-called digital natives; everyone else is in the stone age. Why? Because innovation is binary. Something is innovative, or it isn’t. One flaw is failure. But it’s not hardware flaws that are deadly, it's software. Hardware can fail all day long—we expect it to fail. Not software. Legacy carmakers are selling packages wherein they design the cosmetics but buy the software. It's almost 2018; if it isn't upgradeable in the field, by the user, it's essentially dead to that user.

The Tesla Model 3 is the purest essence of new. The old? If innovation is binary, then there is only one contender for this face-off. A car that is all hardware and no software. Pitting a modern sedan against the 3 would be suicide, which is why we need a car with no software to understand what Tesla is doing. A car that is the purest distillation of the old that you can still buy, and that has more in common with the Model 3 than you’d think.

Morgan Versus Tesla Model 3

I can’t actually show you any of the Tesla Model 3s I've ridden in or driven, because all my conversations were off the record, for reasons I’ve already hinted at. Instead, you get a black box over what I cannot confirm was a Model 3, at a location I cannot disclose. But none of that matters.

Week after week I pit my Morgan 3-Wheeler, both the best and worst car of all time, against the best new and used cars on the market. My Morgan—unreliable, finicky, weird, and lacking in obvious features—always wins. Why? Because it delivers the highest pride of ownership and driving excitement of anything on the road today. It defines "authentic." Because when it comes to narrative, everything else on the road is junk. I will forgive anything it does, or doesn't do, at any price.

Put a Tesla Model 3 next to a my Morgan and something strange happens. The crowd that would otherwise flow to Malvern’s magical rolling casket parts the sea like Moses and gathers around Tesla’s creation. The past loses its luster as the future bursts into light.

For the first time, the Morgan loses, and with it the past, dragging down all the hollow innovation coming out of Japan, Detroit, and Germany.

The Tesla’s central gauge cluster? The Morgan has one, too, but it doesn’t do anything. I have to suction-mount my iPhone there. The Model 3? The screen replicates everything I want my phone to offer while I’m driving. All the buttons critics think people will miss? There’s a reason Blackberry died. Have you seen an IPhone X? No buttons.

The Model 3’s spartan interior? Gorgeous. Clean. Devoid of the BS nonsense and clutter we’ve come to mistake for “design.”

Performance? The Morgan’s performance sucks, yet I still love it. The Tesla Model 3? Tesla has already commoditized EV performance for those who get it. The slowest Model 3 variant will outperform most of the so-called sports cars ever made. Old news.

Comfort? If DeMuro can fit in a Model 3, anyone can. Is he 6’4”? I forget. No one cares. I fit in the car perfectly with my second ex-fiancee behind me, and we’re both six-foot tall. Tesla wins.

Despite all the promises from the legacy car makers, Teslas remain the only cars on the road that function like phones. They can break all day long, but those wireless updates speak directly to digital natives. Every day, the supply of potential customers who expect software updates to come standard increases. Does it matter if the Model 3 has production delays? What about panel gaps? Guess what: no one really cares. I certainly wouldn’t. None of the kids or parents I saw gawking over the Model 3 cared. I’ve seen this happen multiple times.

The hardware details are irrelevant. I could go on and on, but DeMuro’s already done it. The Model 3’s details? Nobody cares, and no one should, because…

What Is Tesla’s Big Secret?

While the media and auto sector slept, a weird Model 3 story recently unfolded that tells us more about Tesla’s future than the Model 3 itself.

Remember Cannonball Baker? He’s the guy they named the illegal race after. He set dozens of cross-country driving records in the first half of the 20th century. Speed limits barely existed. Same for the interstate system. His motivation? Bought and paid for by internal combustion car makers to prove the reliability, safety, and fuel economy of cars as we know them today.

The cross-country Cannonball record times went from 271 hours, in 1915, to under 29 hours in recent years. The rate of improvement, however, has slowed to almost nothing; internal combustion has nothing left to give.

Electric vehicles, on the other hand, have loads of untapped potential, as proven by a small group of people taking EVs in Cannonball Baker’s footsteps. EV record attempts were sparse until the arrival of Tesla’s Supercharger network, but within the last four years we’ve seen incredible improvement in cross-country times.

The Tesla Model S was the first EV to get cross country in a time that wasn’t laughable, with total hours logged in the mid-60s. Then a team made the run in a P85D in just over 59 hours.

Then I joined another team who got across the country in 58 hours, 55 minutes (again in a P85D).

Then I joined another team in a 90D and drove across in 55 hours. A bigger battery pack in the same car doesn’t explain the enormous time improvement, nor did our attempt to optimize our speeds, or use the expanding Supercharger network.

Something is happening, and it’s in Tesla’s battery management software. Let’s keep going down the rabbit hole.

A few months later another team—in a P85D, not a 90Dgot across in just over 51 hours. That’s an improvement of over three hours, with the smaller battery.

Something is happening at Tesla.

Then, in the biggest mystery of all, a Tesla Model 3 appears on Instagram, sitting on a pier in Manhattan Beach. Approximately 50 hours later, that car appears on Instagram parked in front of the Red Ball Garage in New York City—the traditional start line of the real Cannonball Run race.

How did a Tesla Model 3 get across country over an hour faster than a Model S P85D? The Model 3 is lighter and more aerodynamic than an S, but its largest battery pack is rumored to be a 75. No one’s talking. Not Tesla, and not the alleged drivers of the Model 3 that allegedly set this alleged record.

Why? Who knows? Any potential evidence of this new record has disappeared.

Something is happening.

Tesla claims the Model 3’s longer-range model will go 310 miles.The EPA says the Model 3’s range is actually 334 miles.

I’ve done this more than anyone, in ICE cars and Teslas, and I think Tesla is improving their battery management software faster than they, or anyone else, is improving battery hardware.

What is happening? Information control. Managing expectations. When the public gets their 3s, they will marvel over how much better the range is than stated. By which time Tesla will have released another software update.

Where was the legacy media on this? Blind. Talking about panel gaps. No one cares.

Everyone Is Half-Right

Demuro is right: Model 3 buyers are going to love them. Lutz is right: The auto sector is going to get annihilated. Jeremy Clarkson is right: Human driving will survive. Rimac is right: People are going to buy EV hypercars.

But everyone is also wrong. Tesla’s big secret is that they are manufacturing demand for a product the car industry stopped making long ago: real emotion. With every overt and covert manipulation of their own narrative, Tesla amplifies desire for cars upon which a world of potential customers are projecting desire for something better, newer, fresher, more authentic.

Better, new, fresh, and authentic are all in the mind of the beholder, and Tesla has already delivered everything a hungry public needs to put faith in the mythology. You can see it in peoples' faces when a Model X or 3 drive by. You can see it in the product plans of every other automaker on the planet.

The Model 3, both in design and marketing, is beyond genius. It is the car of the next twenty years. Make that fifty. It is the end of the beginning. Execution? I'm not a financial analyst, and don't pretend to be. Tesla’s future is theirs now to lose, and I’m rooting for them.

I'd buy one in a heartbeat, and keep it forever. It will be a future classic.

But I’m still keeping my Morgan.

Alex Roy is Editor-at-Large for The Drive, Host of The Autonocast, co-host of /DRIVE on NBC Sports and author of The Driver, has set numerous endurance driving records in Europe & the USA in the internal combustion, EV, 3-wheeler & Semi-Autonomous Classes, including the infamous Cannonball Run record. You can follow him on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.

Morgan 3-Wheeler Versus Mercedes-AMG G63: A Very Biased Comparison

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The list of cars "defeated" by my Cannonball record-setting Morgan 3-Wheeler is getting longer by the week: the Porsche 911, the Ford Mustang GT, the e-Moke, the Land Rover Series 1, and the Vanderhall Venice. But just when I thought the only thing that could defeat it was another Morgan 3-Wheeler, Germany came back for a rematch. This past weekend, I was handed the keys to a giant, overly-powerful Mercedes-AMG G63—which, in my opinion, is basically the Harvey Weinstein of SUVs—and a true battle was on.

Or was it?

Seriously, what was the Mercedes's owner thinking? The G63 is a terrible vehicle by any measure. Even if it's working perfectly, there is literally nothing good about the venerable G-wagen, except as a symbol. A symbol of bad taste, bad judgment, and disposable income better spent on countless other cars.

Which makes it the perfect opponent to my Morgan 3-Wheeler...except in the taste department. Who wouldn't want a Morgan? Only someone who enjoys paying for sex and wants to make enemies. Every Morgan—even a rusted shell sans engine and wheels—is a delightful conversation piece and invitation to the nearest dinner party. Every G-wagen? Ugh. Groucho Marx once said he didn't want to belong to any club that would have him. The G63 is how you get there.

What happens when the G63—so generously reviewed in G65 form by one of my colleagues at The Drive—faces off against my Morgan? Exactly what you think. The events of 1945 are not avenged; once again, the U.K. demonstrates why numbers and specs don't matter, the English make better music, and quality is more important than quantity. Actually, I take that back. Quality doesn't matter either, because no one cares.

Enjoy the slaughter:

Alex Roy is Editor-at-Large for The Drive, Host of The Autonocast, co-host of /DRIVE on NBC Sports and author of The Driver, has set numerous endurance driving records in Europe & the USA in the internal combustion, EV, 3-wheeler & Semi-Autonomous Classes, including the infamous Cannonball Run record. You can follow him on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.

What Motor Trend Gets Very Wrong About Self-Driving Cars

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Do you like driving? If you do, you should not read Motor Trend. Do you hate driving? If you do, you definitely should not read Motor Trend. Why? Because in a year ripe with the stench of self-driving clickbait, Motor Trend’s latest article about the Audi A8 is now my number one pick for the dumbest article of the year on self-driving cars.

To call this press release journalism is an insult to the clickbait mills regurgitating the #SelfDrivingTheater we see on a daily basis from Business Insider and Electrek. Motor Trend’s article is much worse, because it combines the veneer of a positive review with pessimism over the survival of human driving—upon which the publication’s very survival depends.

The article, “Patient Zero: Assessing The First Case In A Predicted Autonomy Epidemic,” also annihilates what little credibility on autonomy they had based on one half-decent article from last summer. That article, “Testing (Semi) Autonomous Cars With Tesla, Cadillac, Hyundai, and Mercedes,” was a serious effort to do instrumented testing of semi-autonomous systems, and defined them as such in the headline. When it came out in July of 2016, it was one of the first and best comparisons of its kind, but, just when their own findings indicated Tesla’s first generation Autopilot was the clear winner, they pulled a punch and the article ended. The Why behind that decision is worth an article in itself. This is not that article. This is about their latest offense, which doesn’t even go through the motions.

How terrible is it? The Silicon Valley-based self-driving community erupted on Twitter with mockery (most of which focused on the closing paragraph). To truly understand why this article is so bad, we need to deconstruct it line-by-line.

Let’s begin.

Patient Zero: Assessing The First Case In A Predicted Autonomy Epidemic
Experiencing the 2019 Audi A8's Traffic Jam Pilot feature

WTF does this mean? It appears they’re referring to the new Audi A8 as “Patient Zero,” or the first victim of the illness that is autonomy, which clearly lines up with the position one would expect of an automotive publication launched in 1949. But, if Motor Trend wants to immunize their readership from this illness, they’re off to a wretched start. The only way to fight what they’ve defined in the first two words of the headline is to call it what it is, which they get wrong by the tenth, in which they conflate the Audi’s semi-autonomous system with actual autonomy.

Bad, Motor Trend. Bad.

The Audi A8’s Traffic Jam Pilot is, at best, a Level 3 semi-autonomous system, as loosely defined by SAE and the DOT. I’m not going to rehash the levels, which are dumb. Here’s a link. Autonomy starts at Level 4. Most new cars ship with some form of ADAS (or Advanced Driver Assistance System), which falls at or just below Level 2. Level 3 is the bear over which Silicon Valley and the entire car industry have been fighting to determine a reasonable definition of both real-world functionality and “safety,” neither of which SAE or the DOT have addressed in a meaningful way.

What is Level 3? Level 3 is where things are most likely to go wrong. It's the Level where human skill declines. It's when people place faith in technology whose limits they don't understand, their own skills are less likely to save them, and no one wants to go except for marketing purposes. It's a mistake.

No less then Sully Sullenberger, former NTSB Chairman Christopher Hart and ex-Googler Chris Urmson have spoken at length to The Drive about the folly of Level 3. Anyone with a nominal understanding of commercial aviation’s use automation and autonomy—which are not the same thing—will tell you that ground-based Level 3 is highly problematic.

Anyone reviewing automotive Level 3 without real knowledge does so at their reader’s peril.

We haven’t even gotten past the headline. Once we do, the article becomes even more confused.

"I’ve finally done it. I’ve been driven in a car that assumed full responsibility for my safety, freeing me to watch TV on the center screen or do nearly anything that leaves my head facing mostly forward and my eyes open."

No, you didn’t do “it.” The A8 does not assume full responsibility for your safety. If it did, Audi would not have installed a monitoring system requiring the driver to keep their head facing “mostly forward” with their eyes open. All it can do is assume temporary control under limited conditions.

"The Audi A8 chauffeuring me featured Traffic Jam Pilot, billed as the world’s first true SAE Level 3 autonomous driving system. This inevitable technical milestone could mark a more impressive legal miracle."

WTF is Motor Trend doing? On August 4th the same author published this about Cadillac’s Super Cruise:

If Cadillac’s is effectively the first Level 3 system (still incorrectly billed as “autonomous”), and the same author has already driven it, and the Audi’s is the first billed as Level 3, and the author has presumably driven that, why doesn’t Motor Trend distinguish between them? Are they different? I know they are. And I—just like all of Silicon Valley and most of the car industry—know that the SAE Level definitions are vague, if not stupid. In that vagueness lie a thousand press releases meant to boost valuations. In that vagueness lies the danger of end users mistaking one set of functionalities and behaviors for another even within the same level definition.

If the author doesn’t know this, he should. He’s Motor Trend’s Technical Editor.

People have already been injured and killed because of such misunderstandings. What is Motor Trend, one of the largest legacy automotive publications in the world, doing about this? Contributing to it.

When Elon Musk says the media are killing people by not supporting self-driving cars, he’s half-right. The mainstream media are killing people by failing to practice rudimentary journalism, but we expect no better of them because we know they are whores, fools, or both. The specialty media? Guilty of failing to act on the knowledge they’re supposed to have.

Now check this out. Is the next paragraph quoted from a manufacturer press release? Or was it written from scratch? Hard to tell.

First the nuts and bolts. Level 3 autonomy requires all safety-critical systems to have backup. The brake assist and stability control/ABS provide braking redundancy. Electric steering is backstopped by the selective left- or right-side braking used in many lane-departure systems. Forward environmental sensing enjoys quadruple redundancy. A new zFAS central controller fuses data coming in from a high-definition forward-looking camera, a radar unit, ultrasonic sensors in the bumper, and the market’s first production laser scanner. The latter is located down in the bumper and aims a stationary laser at a spinning carousel of flat mirrors, each of which directs the laser beam through its 145-degree field of view. The sensor data gets overlaid on detailed GPS maps, and if one sensing system goes down, the driver is asked to take over. Oh, and the computing power of that Nvidia-based zFAS brain exceeds that of all the computers in today’s A8.

Yadda, yadda. Light nuts, plastic bolts. Someone in the Audi comms department should get a raise for getting this out seemingly verbatim. Not even a link to the zFAS product page? How about a Wiki? Here's a great link from a real publication doing serious journalism in the sector. Sorry, the above paragraph tells the average reader nothing of value other than that they may have to take over.

Wait. The user has to take over?

Talk about burying the lede. This is the crux of everything. That the user may have to take over is core of the biggest debate in self-driving cars, which is that of transitions. When and how transitions occur is the hinge upon which real-world safety will swing. It may determine whether Level 3 is legal—let alone deployable—in the United States. This is what the entire article should be about, and yet the word “transition” isn’t mentioned once. Sad!

Here’s how TJP works: When a nose-to-tail traffic jam slows you to below 37 mph on a multilane highway where opposing traffic is separated by guard rails or concrete, the cluster announces “Traffic Jam Pilot available.” Pressing the “Audi AI” button on the console then changes the edge lines on the instrument cluster from white to green, and you’re off duty. Steer or touch the pedals, and you’re back in control. You must remain ready to take over within 10 seconds, so the car monitors your head using an infrared camera. If it senses that you’re sleeping or nonresponsive—or if the end of the highway is approaching, or if a lane change becomes necessary (TJP doesn’t change lanes)—the system directs you to take over. First the cluster-edge lines change to red with a message, followed by a warning tone. The car then slows down, jabs the brakes, and tightens the seat belt. Finally it stops in the lane, engages the parking brake and hazard signals, unlocks the doors, and calls for help.

That’s not really how it works. That’s what it’s supposed to do. Functionality and behavior are not the same thing. Does it work everywhere? Does the system get updated? Does it need to be? If so, does one have to go to the dealer? Or is it wireless? Is there redundant Lidar? Cadillac’s Super Cruise doesn’t use Lidar. Audi does. Why didn’t Audi go out and map the interstates like Cadillac did? Or did they? Does that matter? There's AI inside? What kind? I can buy a car with AI today? Wow. Wish I could learn more about that. Does Audi assume liability if the system fails? Volvo says they will for some as-yet unreleased, geofenced L3/4 system. How does Audi’s compare to Volvo’s?

And we haven’t even gotten to that 10 second transition interval. Are the warnings good enough? What if music is playing? Do the warning tones supercede the stereo? Are they played over the same system? If not, are the transition warning system alerts played back through a redundant speaker? How does Audi’s transition warning system compare to Cadillac’s? Or Tesla’s? Or Volvo’s? Or an Airbus?

Whoa...the Audi will stop in its lane? Is that a good idea? Who made that decision?

So many questions. No answers from the venerable Motor Trend.

Sadly, you can’t buy a car with this system just yet. Audi and German authorities are working to amend UN Regulation No. 79 to raise the current limit for “automatically commanded steering function” from 10 to 130 km/h (6 to 81 mph). This amendment is expected any day, after which Audi should quickly obtain homologation for TJP in Germany, rolling it out to other countries later. Audi tech boss Peter Mertens says 81-mph Level 3 autonomy will follow in several years, with considerably more conditions and functions built in.

Is it sad? If Motor Trend thinks autonomy is an illness, then shouldn’t they be glad it’s not yet available in the US?

China and the U.S. have no autonomous-steering speed restrictions, but state laws—such as a 1971 New York statute that requires drivers keep one hand on the wheel at all times—pose problems. Audi’s director of U.S. government affairs, Brad Stertz, says TJP is compliant with current Federal Motor Vehicle Safety Standards. He notes that bipartisan House legislation now being reconciled in the Senate will grant NHTSA authority over all future autonomous vehicle standards. As for TJP, Stertz says Audi is still tailoring the system to our unique urban highways and fine-tuning liability hedges such as event-data recorders. All 2019 A8s will ship with zFAS and the laser scanner (both enhance Level 2 adaptive cruise) but perhaps not the driver-monitoring camera or capacitive steering wheel. Without these, the cars won’t be flash-upgradable to TJP.

So Audi may remove two critical driver safety monitoring features—including one Cadillac deemed essential for Super Cruise—before selling the A8 with this system in the USA? Why isn’t entire article about that? Is Cadillac wrong? Is Audi? Tesla? Does Motor Trend care? Should its readers?

The system works great, but because full autonomy will ultimately decimate whole populations of automobile critics, you’ll forgive me for curbing my enthusiasm.

The system works great? Is that all the Technical Editor has to say? Has he even driven it? Is there any evidence in the article he did? Did I miss something? Whose hardware does Audi use? Is it Mobileye? Tesla used to use that. Stock prices rise and fall based on such information. What software? Was it built internally? It works great, but he’s not enthusiastic? If he knows his job is in danger, why is he hastening it with this pap?

What is going on here?

What’s going on is the death knell of legacy automotive media, totally aware of their ignorance in the face of autonomy, yet doing nothing. Motor Trend and other outlets have a choice. If they want to defend against the inevitable rise of full autonomy, they need to raise the flag of information and education. They need to fight to raise drivers education standards. They need to protect us from bad autonomy. They need to report on augmented driving systems. They need to dissect every semi-autonomous system and do so with real understanding. They need to give enthusiasts reason to believe human driving will survive, explain how it might be protected, and why it deserves to be.

Based on what I’ve seen here, Motor Trend has already given up.

Alex Roy is Editor-at-Large for The Drive, Host of The Autonocast, co-host of /DRIVE on NBC Sports and author of The Driver, has set numerous endurance driving records in Europe & the USA in the internal combustion, EV, 3-wheeler & Semi-Autonomous Classes, including the infamous Cannonball Run record. You can follow him on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.

Official USAF Twitter Jokes About Nuclear War and Questions Santa's Existence

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U.S. military social media accounts can often be painfully boring, posting updates on things such as when certain base gates will be open, closures for extreme weather, upcoming morale and welfare events, and just re-posting official news. At a time when talk of nuclear weapons has come back into vogue, one U.S. Air Force Base decided to make a darkly humorous reference to nuclear war before getting into a major Twitter battle with another one about bombers, deterrence, and the existence of Santa Claus – no really.

On Oct. 11, 2017, the Department of Defense’s official Twitter account posted a link to a collection of information and recent news regarding both nuclear deterrence and ballistic missile defense. This makes perfect since, for more than 10 months at that point, these had been important topics in light of North Korea’s increasingly threatening ballistic missile and nuclear weapon tests especially, but also on account of similar developments in Russia and Iran. Statements from U.S. President Donald Trump and members of his administration have also helped reignite the public debate about various aspets of nuclear arms in both the United States and elsewhere abroad.

Heightened tensions and "fiery rhetoric" have a lot of people on edge. So it’s somewhat notable that two days after the Pentagon’s initial Tweet, the official account for Minot Air Force Base in North Dakota responded with “Hey @DeptofDefense, ‘would you like to play a game?’”

For those who might not know the reference, this was an obvious, if slightly incorrect callback to the 1983 movie WarGames, in which a young computer hacker unwittingly convinces a military super computer that there is an incoming nuclear attack on the United States from the Soviet Union. The teenager thinks the war plans are actually computer games and responds to the system’s prompt of “Shall we play a game?”

What follows is the main character having to go toe-to-toe with the computer to convince it to abort the launch of U.S. Air Force intercontinental ballistic missiles (ICBM), which would almost certainly touch off a nuclear holocaust. The protagonist eventually forces the machine to learn that when it comes to “global thermonuclear war,” “the only winning move is not to play,” a comment on the very nature of deterrence.

At present, the real Air Force is in the process of developing its first new ICBM in decades, as well as a new long-range nuclear-capable cruise missile. The service is in charge of two full legs of America’s nuclear triad, which includes the land-based missiles, nuclear-armed bombers, and the U.S. Navy’s ballistic missile submarines. In total, the United States has 4,000 nuclear warheads, including both gravity bombs and different types of missiles, plus another 2,000 it's in the process of dismantling, according to a report from The New York Times' editorial board. These are sitting at various bases and depots around the country, which often require transport in special tractor trailers full of James Bond-esque defenses.

Minot Air Force Base itself is home to both the 5th Bomb Wing, with its nuclear-capable B-52H Stratofortess bombers, and the 91st Missile Wing, with its nuclear armed LGM-30G Minuteman III ICBMs. As such the joke comes off at best as darkly humorous. Especially so, since there have been multiple, real world examples of early warning systems giving a potentially devastating false report.

In 1979, a glitch in the computers at the combined U.S.-Canadian North American Aerospace Defense Command's (NORAD) headquarters, the Air Forces Strategic Command, the Pentagon, and the dedicated backup Alternate National Military Command Center all showed that the Soviet Union had launched a nuclear strike. In something out of WarGames, a technician had inserted a disk with a training simulation into the system without warning and set the whole network off. Thankfully, clear heads identified the source of the issue and avoided a nuclear holocaust.

Then, in 1983, the same year WarGames hit theaters, Stanislav Petrov, then a Soviet Air Defense Forces officer, had to make snap assessments not once, but twice, that a space-based early warning system had malfunctioned and that the United States had not actually launched a nuclear attack. Experts widely believe that if Petrov had reported the incoming missiles as an actual attack, the Kremlin would have ordered a world-ending response, and have dubbed him "the man who saved the world."

More recently, in February 2017, U.S. personnel at Spangdahlem Air Base in Germany received an urgent, automated alert about an incoming missile through their work stations. Again, thankfully, it was obvious that something had gone wrong. Unfortunately, these kind of mishaps have been terrifyingly common over the years, often triggering various parts of the United States government's extensive system to make sure it can keep functioning during just such an apocalyptic crisis. In May 2017, The War Zone's own Tyler Rogoway got to have a detailed chat with Garrett Graff, author of Raven Rock: The U.S. Government's Secret Plan To Save Itself While The Rest Of Us Die, about the full extent of these precautions and the potential for accidents.

And especially with heightened tensions over North Korea’s threats to conduct an unprecedented atmospheric nuclear test, the Tweet from Minot seems in some ways both flippant and the kind of lighthearted candor one might hope from American military personnel who literally have the ability to end the world as we know it. There is a well-known motto among the service’s missileers already that “death wears bunny slippers,” a nod to the oddly casual nature of ICBM launch crews as they maintain their alert posture 24-hours a day, ready to respond at a moment’s notice.

But whoever’s behind the Minot’s Twitter account didn’t stop there. On Oct. 24, 2017, the base decided to engage in a bit of sibling rivalry with the team at Whiteman Air Force Base in Missouri, home to the 509th Bomb Wing and its stealthy B-2 Spirit bombers.

Seizing on a post from the main U.S. Air Force Twitter account marking U.S. President Richard Nixon’s decision to halt the bombing of North Vietnam briefly in 1972, Minot pointed out that it had been in the bomber business longer than Whiteman. What followed was an almost absurdist play of memes and juvenile insults from two central pillars of America’s nuclear deterrent apparatus, which eventually prompted the service’s central Twitter account to try and chide both parties into line, acting like a grumpy parent.

Whiteman’s Twitter account responded by pointing out the age and lack of stealthy features on the B-52, which first entered service in 1955. The aircraft is getting long in the teeth, with the Air Force looking into new and substantial upgrades, including replacing the bomber’s eight dated engines, which have become a logistical nightmare.

Minot countered by noting that the B-2 reached initial operational capability in 1997 and that the Air Force is in the process of developing a new stealth bomber, the B-21 Raider. That’s when the Air Force’s main Twitter account stepped in to say that if the two base accounts didn’t knock it off, “No television for a week!”

“Fine,” Whiteman’s social media Tweet posted, along with an animated picture of a child looking nonplussed. “Ain’t got time for T.V. anyway. #Training #Deterrence.”

The “threat” didn’t change matters much and the roasting continued through Oct. 25, 2017. Like small children on the playground confronted by an adult, the two accounts blamed each other in meme-filled posts for “starting it.”

At one point, Minot bragged that the B-52H can carry more bombs than the B-2, to which Whiteman responded by highlighting the Spirit’s mission to carry the 30,000 pound GBU-57/B Massive Ordnance Penetrator (MOP), saying it was about “quality not quantity” and throwing in another animated picture of James Franco from the movie The Interview – which involves a U.S. government plot to assassinate North Korean dictator Kim Jong-un – with the phrase “They hate us cause they ain’t us.”

At one point the two squabbling Twitter accounts agreed that the KC-135R tankers from the 22nd Aerial Refueling Wing at McConnell Air Force Base were an integral part of the bomber mission and that without them neither the B-52 nor the B-2 would be able to get anywhere near the target area. The 22nd is specifically assigned the role of supporting bombers during a nuclear mission.

Minot and Whiteman declined to point out that the KC-135 is even older than the B-52. The Air Force has been steadily upgradinge those aircraft with new glass cockpits to help keep them flying for the foreseeable future as it continues to struggle with getting the new KC-46A tanker into service.

Near the end of the day on Oct. 25, 2017, whoever runs the main Air Force Twitter account had clearly decided it was time to go figuratively thermonuclear and try and end banter. “We didn’t want to do this, but if you 2 can’t get along we must,” the post began.

“Santa will bring you nothing this year,” it continued, before doing something that only a truly terrible parent would do. “Because he isn’t real!”

Whiteman’s account appeared stunned, sending along another meme of Homer Simpson disappearing into a hedge. Minot’s challenged the assertion in response, noting that NORAD famously tracks him every year on Christmas Eve – which is an entirely separate story that started with a misprinted phone number in a 1955 Sears ad that offered children a chance to call Santa, but instead connected them to the American component of the air defense command.

The Washington Examiner quickly ran a story saying that the air Force had “confirmed’ that Santa wasn’t real, putting the service’s Twitter account into something closer to more conventional damage control.

“Santa is real,” it Tweeted out. “Bluffing to get @Whiteman_AFB @TeamMinot in line.”

Air Force Times subsequently ran its own story with the very accurate headline “Air Force says Santa isn't real, regrets it immediately.”

The Santa debacle seemed to end the whole episode, whether the Air Force’s Twitter account was ever really serious about wanting to curtail it or not. Minot has since deleted most of its Tweets, but Whiteman’s posts are still up. It’s why we’ve chosen to use screen shots throughout this story, in order to best preserve a record of this oddly intense debate.

When it comes to global thermonuclear war, the only way to win might be to not play at all, but it doesn’t appear to prevent the stewards of America’s nuclear arsenal and those who keep the watch from gently ribbing each other in the meantime.

Contact the author: jtrevithickpr@gmail.com

Does The Future Belong To Rimac or Koenigsegg?

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What is the future of sports cars? Everyone knows my opinion. Internal combustion is going to go away. Not completely—and not right away—but the future belongs to electrification. That doesn't necessarily mean fully electric, however, as Koenigsegg and Rimac's latest hypercars make it clear there are still two ways to deploy the technology of the future. Oh yeah, there's also Acura and the new hybrid NSX, but we'll get to that, and why I don't care.

Behold, episode two of /Drive on NBC Sports: Electrification, in which Matt Farah, Mike Spinelli and I duke it out on a topic I know more about than both of them combined.

Am I biased? Yes. I'm totally biased in favor of the obvious and true, which is that Tesla has shown us how good a pure EV can be. From the Roadster to the Model S P100D, Tesla has annihilated all notions of what an EV can do and be. With the right infrastructure, a Tesla is better than anything else on the road today. Corporate growing pains? I don't care, because when I get out of a Model S, every other sedan seems primitive. The proof? My Tesla Norway segment, in which we take an S across the most electrified country in the world. (Watch it, then check out my companion article giving it even more context.)

That's followed by Farah's attempt to prove that the hybrid Acura NSX is an amazing car, combining the best of the past and future in a car more trackable then a Tesla. Duh. Teslas aren't supposed to be trackable. I argue that Acura's iteration—no matter how good—is the future slowed down to meet the present. Good enough, but five years late. What did Farah think?

Watch his segment and tell me, because I refuse. The old NSX is the only NSX in my book.

Spinelli? He goes out and tests the newest Porsche Panamera Hybrid, which I totally approve of because it doesn't look like the old one. Does it matter how good it is? Porsche is one of the few companies that could survive making pure-gas engined (ICE) cars in an electric future, because they're Porsche. But, because they're Porsche, they must always push, which is why I think this is still only a half-measure until the first real competition for Tesla arrives in the form of the Mission-E. The Panamera is still an amazing car, as Spinelli segment proves.

The Rimac Concept One

Which brings us to the meat of the episode, which is what happens when the two most advanced hypercar manufacturers in the world let me into their latest creations. On one side, Rimac's all-electric Concept One. On the other, Koenigsegg's hybrid Regera. The Regera makes every other hybrid seem slow and primitive, and that includes the McLaren, Ferrari and 918. The Rimac? As different from Tesla as it is from the Regera.

Both incredible. Amazing. Brilliant. The future is electric, but it won't be fully electrified for a long, long time.

See why on Thursday, October 26th on /DRIVE on NBC Sports. Check your local listings.

My full comparo of the Concept One and Regera? Coming #Soon.

Alex Roy is Editor-at-Large for The Drive, Host of The Autonocast, co-host of /DRIVE on NBC Sports and author of The Driver, has set numerous endurance driving records in Europe & the USA in the internal combustion, EV, 3-wheeler & Semi-Autonomous Classes, including the infamous Cannonball Run record. You can follow him on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.

The Right Path to Autonomy—and the Wrong One

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What is the best path to autonomy? I was recently asked to join the debate over at 2025AD, an excellent site focused on the year many claim will be the watershed for the arrival of self-driving cars. I'm bullish on the morality of autonomy, but bearish on current methods of getting there. My opponents? Most of the pro-autonomy community.

As a driving enthusiast, people often ask me why I’m so enthusiastic about self-driving cars. The answer seems obvious to me, but it’s not because I’m aligning myself with the pro-autonomy camp. The benefits autonomy will bring would appear to resolve a universe of problems that are seemingly intractable without it, but I think both sides are absolutely wrong in their either/or vision of when and how autonomy will change society as we know it.

In that binary vision, each side ignores the fundamental truth underlying the other, and the mutually beneficial co-existence that will only be possible if the fundamentalists on both sides get out of the way.

I have no doubt that a Zero-day—the day when the last human will get into a car and choose to drive on a public road—is coming, but that day is so far off as to be irrelevant today. How far off? At least 50 years, as many as 100.

I also don’t believe in a global, regional or even a national tipping point toward autonomy. Any profound shifts must take place at the intersection of politics and culture, which vary widely even within nations. The United States—one of the most important markets and the de facto R&D lab of the world—is a patchwork of nation-states, and if all politics is local, any technology that relies on politics will be as well.

Between now and that Zero-day—which I first wrote about in the 2015 Jalopnik article, “How Science Fiction Failed Us”—we who hope to see the broader benefits of autonomy face a long slog. For those who don’t see any benefit to direct human control of vehicles, disappointment awaits. No timeline will be fast enough. Why? Because even if a Level 5 self-driving car was made available tomorrow, human nature remains a force of nature no less powerful than oceanic currents. For those skeptical of autonomy, every autonomous mile driven is a dangerous assault on reason and undefined notions of freedom. If society is to reap the true benefits of autonomy, both sides need to understand what the other is trying to achieve.

It is impossible to argue the merits: traffic, pollution and road death rates will improve dramatically—hence the unquestionable moral primacy of autonomy. That is why the human driving camp has only two arguments, one simple, the other they are barely able to articulate: 1) autonomous technology isn’t ready and/or never will be, and 2) “loss of control” or agency.

The technological hurdles will be crossed; that is inevitable. That leaves the issues of control, agency and notions of freedom which will take a lot longer to address. Note that I said address, not solve. Technology can solve a variety of problems, but human nature isn’t one of them. Human nature isn’t a problem, but a fact. Culture can change, but human nature remains a constant within it.

Because the two sides in the autonomy debate are arguing past each other — morality on one, philosophy on the other — there is no single path to autonomy.

There is a right path, and a wrong one.

The wrong one lies in the premature and inaccurate marketing of technologies that can’t be successfully demonstrated, and the skepticism, disappointment and deaths that will yield. Every time a journalist reviews a semi-autonomous car with Self-Driving, Driverless or Autonomous in the headline, the case for autonomy is harmed.

The wrong one also lies in mandating autonomous zones or lanes. Because driving is a privilege rather than a right, any encroachment—even perceived—will lead to resentment, active opposition and the delay of inevitable outcomes. People need to have choice. That’s why social engineering always fail. People will be driving for a long time.They need to opt-in, not resent the lack of an opt-out.

The wrong one lies in believing autonomy is entirely good or entirely bad, and arguing for/against based on technologies that 99.9% of people even within the automotive and tech sectors have never experienced, and among whom the second-order consequences are barely understood. (Here’s a good take from Benedict Evans.)

Sadly, the loudest supporters of autonomy are the ones doing it the most harm. Their dogmatic bleating is as foolish as those who refuse to give up their steering wheels. The majority of mobility “experts” — most of whom know little more than what they read in half-baked studies or see at trade shows — are doing a great job of inspiring opposition to the very future they hope to see. The history of “experts” is one of mountains of data, guesswork and bandwagon jumping. From the Rand Corporation’s application of system theory in the Vietnam War to the big consulting companies’ failure to predict Uber or Tesla, experts have been wrong again and again. “Experts” are essentially reactive. Garbage in, garbage out. There can be no war on pollution, traffic and road deaths without recognizing that human nature cannot be quantified, and that autonomy is not weapon or even a solution, but a catalyst.

The right path must acknowledge both sides and deploy autonomy as soon as possible within the framework of people’s real wants and needs rather than some utopian vision.

In the near-term, stop trying to convince people who will never want autonomy that it’s coming, or even good. Limit the marketing of Level 4 — as Voyage is doing — to use cases that sell themselves.

In the mid-term, the right path must acknowledge that autonomy isn’t binary, but a continuum. Between now and ubiquitous Level 4+, myriad semi-autonomous technologies yet to be seen will hit our streets, and they aren’t Level 3 as popularly defined. Sorry, but Level 3 as we know it is not the bridge to 4, and anyone developing, deploying or marketing 3 as such is missing a multi-decade opportunity. Augmented driving, currently touted publicly only by Toyota’s Research Institute (TRI), is the ONLY method of attracting the current and next two generations of drivers to any form of autonomy. (TRI’s Gil Pratt podcast interview here).

Augmented Driving is the opposite of L2/3, and resolves the conflict between culture and autonomy. The uncrashable car under human control appeals to the human need for freedom and agency in a way no iteration of L3 can. (Deeper explainer here.)

The right path to autonomy is the shortest one that deploys autonomy in all its forms — including the hybrid human/machine forms that will augment human skills rather than replace them — with the support of all.

Alex Roy is Editor-at-Large for The Drive, Host of The Autonocast, co-host of /DRIVE on NBC Sports and author of The Driver, has set numerous endurance driving records in Europe & the USA in the internal combustion, EV, 3-wheeler & Semi-Autonomous Classes, including the infamous Cannonball Run record. You can follow him onFacebook, Twitter and Instagram.


Who Is The Juicero Of Self-Driving Cars?

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Remember Juicero? The guys with the juicer that required connectivity, a subscription and bags of raw fruits and vegetables you could press by hand? It cost $400. Then it was $200. Then they shut down. How could they lose $100M+ of investor money? It’s easy to say it was something no one wanted or needed, but that doesn’t tell the full story. No, you’ve got to start by looking at the underlying assumptions that led allegedly smart investors to lose their shirts. Deconstructing the Juicero pitch will answer the fun question:

Who is the Juicero of self-driving cars?

First, a look at how the Juicero pitch went down:

Juicero: It’s a juicer. It’s connected.
Investors: Connectivity is hot and getting hotter.
Juicero: It’s a subscription model.
Investors: Recurring revenues are good.
Juicero: Raw fruits are messy. Buying them is a hassle.
Investors: Customers hate work. How much do you need?

The rush to invest in solutions for problems that don’t exist is at the heart of startup failures, but it was the myopia behind each of the underlying assumptions that really torpedoed Juicero. Just because connectivity is good doesn’t make for a good connected device. Subscriptions? If subscriptions universally made sense, there would be a subscription gun startup, probably based in Texas, but there isn’t. Do people really hate raw fruits? Is buying them a really a hassle?

Real solutions start with needs, not methods. No assemblage of methods—regardless of how clever, timely or popular it is—can invent an enduring need. If the assumptions behind methods are flawed, you’re dead in the water.

Take connectivity and subscriptions, replace bags of juice with self-driving cars, and you have a recipe for disaster.

You also have a fun game.

It would have been too easy to make a list starting with Faraday and ending with companies you’ve never heard of. It wouldn’t have taken long, and trust me, I wanted to, but then I found an article on TechCrunch that saved me fifteen minutes of work. Just when I thought the stench of self-driving clickbait propaganda couldn't get any thicker, two famous venture capitalists delivered a hilarious display of catchphrase-filled nonsense written with the insight and grammatical errors of an intern.

The “authors” are Tom Alberg and Craig Mundle of Madrona Ventures. Their resumes are weighty, but very smart people are often just people who make bigger mistakes. We shall dissect their article line-by-line, and in doing so find our Juicero on wheels.

That’s a nice title. What does it mean? Nothing, and everything. Of course we should plan for it, but first we have to know what “it” is. What plan does Madrona want? One they can profit from. Does that make it good for anyone else? Better than what we have? I like plans, but there are good plans and bad plans. We have to dig deeper to understand what they’re trying to get at. We don’t have to dig far.

The arrival of autonomous vehicles bring the prospect of improved transportation systems without the capital costs, operating subsidies and construction delays of new highway lanes and fixed rail systems.

Nothing like an opinion stated as fact. Is there a prospect of improved systems without the costs, subsidies and delays they refer to? Only in the utopian dreams of urban planners and VCs trying to sell “solutions” based on anticipated growth rather than success in the real world. Tom Vanderbilt’s seminal “Traffic” explains it for laymen. Autonomy doesn’t necessarily eliminate friction or inefficiencies. It shifts them within the very transportation systems everyone wants to improve. Traffic rises to meet capacity. Study fluid dynamics. The same “experts” touting autonomy say we need massive V2V infrastructure for it to work. That means massive capital costs, construction delays and endless repairs to a universe of as-yet undeployed hardware in and on our streets. Cities can barely maintain our current infrastructure. Just wait until it’s connected. So much for savings.

Cities, states, and the Federal Government, need to revise their transportation planning accordingly.

That makes sense, in a Malcolm Gladwellian, conventional wisdom-as-philosophy kind of way. Also, water is wet, and you don’t need two spaces after a comma.

This might be a nice time to check out the three images attached to the article. What’s happening in this one?

Nothing of value. A car with a wifi symbol. A man not driving. A clock. A phone. An app.

And what about this cheap stock image?

Nothing to see here.

What about this one?

That one had to be free, right?

Let’s keep going.

Autonomous vehicles have gone from a Jetson-like dream to a clear reality in less than one decade.

Are autonomous cars a clear reality today? Nope. NHTSA/DOT policy is a mess. The Automation level charts are vague and stupid. No one has gotten a Level 4 car cross-country without disengagements, and no one knows when that will happen. There are multiple cars coming out classified as Level 3, and their behavior is radically different. Low cost solid state Lidar still hasn’t hit the market. By Madrona’s clock, the reality of self-driving cars will hit in 2020. Automakers are saying 2025 at the earliest, and that’s for highly geofenced Level 4. Have the Madrona boys spent much time in anything better than a demo car on a closed course?

I’m all for autonomy, but this is nonsense.

In 2010, when Google first started developing autonomous vehicles, people asked, “Why are they wasting money on this? That’s never going to work.”

You could say that of a lot of things, and it would remain true. You know what they say about broken clocks? For every technology that works despite naysayers, there are dozens that never do. Hello, flying taxis. I’m bullish, but that Jetsons future remains decades away

Today, we have not only seen public pilots of autonomous vehicles from companies like Uber and recent announcement by automakers such as Audi that it plans to begin selling, in 2018, a production car with Level 3 autonomy (meaning it requires no human attention to the road at speeds under 37 miles per hour), we have also begun to see striking data on the benefits of autonomous vehicles.

WTF are they talking about? THAT IS NOT THE DEFINITION OF LEVEL 3. Here’s the actual definition, courtesy of SAE, also known as the Society of Automotive Engineers:

“L3 Conditional Automation: The driving mode-specific performance by an Automated Driving System of all aspects of the dynamic driving task with the expectation that the human driver will respond appropriately to a request to intervene.”

Dear Madrona: fire your intern. Also, there’s a thing called Google. Audi’s system is but one variant within Level 3, and it is a semi-autonomous system, which does not make it a self-driving car. Your intern should have known better. Ive read your resumes. So should you.

As for that striking data on the benefits of autonomous vehicles...

For example, after the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration investigated a Tesla Autopilot crash, they found a 40% decrease in traffic accidents when Tesla’s Autopilot feature was enabled in cars.

I am a strong supporter of any efforts to improve safety, but we still don’t have clarity as to which component of Tesla Autopilot may have led to the 40% figure. Since Autopilot is only a semi-autonomous technology, ascribing any safety benefit to autonomy in general is disingenuous. As someone who has spent a mountain of time using Autopilot, I can tell you that figure is likely derived from the Automatic Emergency Braking system, which is a sub-component of ADAS, which stands for Advanced Driver Assistance System, all of which falls around Level 2. When it comes to Level 4 autonomy, no matter how many bricks you stack, you will not get there without gluing together the component technologies. Where's the glue? Maybe Madrona should invest in that.

When investing tens or hundreds of millions of dollars, know your terminology.

In addition to significant reductions in accidents, the benefits of autonomous vehicles will also include less congestion, reduced emissions, reclaimed productive time, fewer new roads, reclaimed parking space, lower transportation costs for all and improved mobility of the elderly and disabled.

Yadda, yadda.

The bigger the problem, the harder it is to solve. We can solve a lot of things, but there is one thing we cannot solve for, and that is human nature. People will buy EVs without autonomy. Build real rail in California and traffic on the 5 and 101 will go down. Are there use cases for self-driving cars anytime soon? Absolutely, but all the near term use cases combined do not come anywhere close to reaching a a tipping point. Massive, multi-decade cultural changes need to take place before we see real autonomy on a mass scale. Well intentioned platitudes can’t and won’t get us there.

As traffic planners across the nation wrestle with the issues of moving people and goods within and between cities, there are a variety of transportation options to consider with everything from Hyperloop, to highways, bridges, buses, and light rail.

Nice SAT writing here. I don’t see anything about driver education, which would solve most of the overwhelming majority of the safety issue, saving hundreds of billions in autonomous R&D. Not very profitable for VCs, though.

One thing that these projects all have in common is large-scale infrastructure projects which take a long time (often multiple decades) and require large up-front capital investments. Examples include the Big Dig in Boston, which cost nearly $15B, began in 1982 and was not completed until 2007; and in Seattle, the Alaskan Way Viaduct replacement, which began in 2001 and is not expected to be completed until 2021, at a cost of more than $4B.

Incorporating autonomous vehicles into our transportation systems, on the other hand, is a very low cost way to drastically improve the flow of goods and people within a region as long as we begin now to make the policy changes that will allow the benefits to be achieved as the technology comes to market.

I suppose investing in autonomous vehicles may be cheaper than the infrastructure they refer to, but it’s still way more expensive than improving driver's ed, which isn’t sexy. Ubiquity of autonomous vehicles is also decades away, and a mixed environment of human and self-driving cars is likely to exacerbate traffic, not improve it.

Here in Seattle, we are proposing to convert Interstate-5 between Seattle and Vancouver, over a number of years, into an autonomous vehicle-only highway. Seattle and Vancouver are vibrant cities, but the transportation between them is tedious and impedes valuable economic partnerships.

That sounds fun, but dedicated a lane does not an autonomous Utopia make. Not even close.

Our proposal, which could be applied to many main Interstate highways and local limited-access thoroughfares, is to begin turning carpool lanes into autonomous vehicle lanes as early as next year.

Too bad there won’t be any Level 4 or 5 cars that can use it for a long time. There will be tens of millions of human drivers who can’t however, increasing traffic in the remaining lanes. Unless you add lanes, which gets you back to square one re: construction costs. Have fun with that.

Recall that HOV lanes were created as an incentive for commuters to change their behaviors. It is time to use that incentive to accelerate the move to the fututre architecture of transportation. As the number of autonomous vehicles grows over the coming decade, we could gradually dedicate entire lanes exclusively to AVs (and perhaps fit three AV lanes into the space of two traditional car lanes). Eventually, the entire highway would become autonomous-only.

Great ideas, but no Level 4 or 5 cars on the horizon.

While some stakeholders believe it is still too early to begin planning for autonomous vehicles on public roads, at the current rate of technological progress and with the early data suggesting drastic improvements in traffic safety, we believe we will reach a major tipping point during the coming decade, well within the time frame of a major transportation project.

Malcolm Gladwell must be popular at the Madrona office. Vanderbilt? Not so much.

The very same computing advances that allow your cell phones, computers, tablets and other gadgets to recognize you and respond to your voice now underpin the enabling of cars to achieve more and more autonomous operation. In the computing world these advances proceed quickly, with society adopting them en masse.

Wow.

Yes, computing speeds are increasing, but computing speeds don’t equate to building the hardware and software stacks necessary for the autonomy Madrona is talking about. Data is not information, and processing it requires machine learning/AI that still isn’t ready.

The only thing that will delay the arrival of autonomous vehicles in the U.S.A. will be timidity on the part of regulators and legislatures to give the public the chance to take them up at a similar rate.

The platitudes just keep on coming.

There are still many questions in introducing autonomous vehicles into our current transportation systems– what level of autonomony will be required for inattentive driving under various conditions, will most people continue to own cars, how will street parking change -- but dealing with these issues is clearly less expensive than the massive investment of building new highways, bridges, or rail lines.

Hard to take this seriously when the author(s) didn’t spell check “autonomony”.

Autonomous vehicles offer a plethora of benefits to cities and their tax payers -- fast to market, low investment requirements, and many societal benefits ranging from fewer accidents to broader access to low-cost transportation.

“Tax payers” is usually one word, but that’s not as egregious as saying autonomous vehicles offer the benefit of being “fast to market”. If I was investing in a VC fund in this sector, it wouldn't be Madrona. Does anyone there read Reilly Brennan's Future of Transportation newsletter?

Transit planners across the country should accelerate their consideration of the importance of autonomous vehicles as they map out their plans for the future of city and interstate transportation. These changes will be as important as the construction of the Interstate Highways System in the last century. It is time to get going…

NHTSA/DOT and Congress have already given up making any serious effort to regulate the relevant technologies. Without subsidizing autonomy itself, there is literally nothing they could do to speed it up.

So, what is Madrona's plan? Invest in anything in sector, it seems. VCs can afford to lose, on the assumption a handful of investments have big exits. Based on their article, they're jumping on the bandwagon.

Who is the Juicero of self-driving cars?

It’s whomever in sector Madrona invests in next.

Alex Roy is Editor-at-Large for The Drive, Host of The Autonocast, co-host of /DRIVE on NBC Sports and author of The Driver, has set numerous endurance driving records in Europe & the USA in the internal combustion, EV, 3-wheeler & Semi-Autonomous Classes, including the infamous Cannonball Run record. You can follow him on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.

Morgan Versus Porsche 911 Carrera S: a Very Biased Comparison

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Let's go back to World War 2. Do you know how the British finally sunk the Bismarck? It didn't take much. Just a few obsolete Swordfish biplane torpedo bombers whose wings weren't even metal. Yup, the Brits used fabric. That's the thing. No matter how much engineering you put into something, you can't beat simplicity. Grit. Wood.

You know where this is going.

This week on Morgan Versus, the world's best/worst car — my Morgan 3-wheeler — faces off with Germany's best. Maybe not their absolute best. But a pretty good one: a 201x Porsche 911 Carrera S Cabriolet. What year is the Porsche? I forgot. Actually, I didn't even really check. Does it matter? No. Every Porsche is the best Germany could do in any given year. You can't say that about British cars. I think this 911 is a 2013. Guess what?

No one cares. Ok, maybe fools like Shmee150, who think new new is better.

Is the Morgan junk? Even if it is, it's still the best car I've ever owned, and the greatest driving experience of all time. The Porsche? Even if it's perfect, it's still junk compared to the Morgan. Why? Because some things can't be measured. Actually, they can, just not with numbers.

For the record, I own a 911. I love it. It's a 1987 Targa, and it's amazing. But that car wasn't available, so instead we have this sacrificial lamb. Let's find out close it was, or if the Porsche got torpedoed.

Alex Roy is Editor-at-Large for The Drive, Host of The Autonocast, co-host of /DRIVE on NBC Sports and author of The Driver, has set numerous endurance driving records in Europe & the USA in the internal combustion, EV, 3-wheeler & Semi-Autonomous Classes, including the infamous Cannonball Run record. You can follow him on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.

Audible is Giving Away 20 Brand New Volvo XC60s

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Audible announced that it's Celebrating 20 Years of Listeners Contest on Monday, and winners can take home a 2018 Volvo XC60.

The contest title does exactly what it sounds like, as next year marks the 20th anniversary of the audiobook purveyor's claim to fame. Audible introduced the first mass-produced digital audio player to complement its website in January of 1998. Ten years later, Audible was acquired by Amazon.com, expanding its reach to millions more listeners.

The site is eager to celebrate early, and 20 lucky Audible members who participate in the contest will win a brand new Volvo luxury crossover, thanks to Amazon's deep pockets. The company picked the XC60 for it's impressive safety, technology, and Audible app integration, and optimized each vehicles' Bower & Wilkins audio system for the best storytelling experience.

Entering to win takes just a few steps and is one that any Audible member in the United States over the age of 18 can do. All you need to do is submit a 30-second video explaining why you enjoy listening to audiobooks on the website. The company encourages participants to get creative, so originality and authenticity is key to creating a Volvo-worthy clip.

Audible will review and post all approved videos on its website and social media, and wants the public to vote on the best videos. The deadline for submission ends Oct. 13.

For those looking for inspiration, Audible recruited narrating veterans like Nick Offerman to create their own videos, but you needn't worry about competing with Ron Swanson in the actual contest.

The VW Jetta Smyth Ute Project Gets a Facelift

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So far most of our attention has been directed to the back of our Volkswagen Jetta—specifically, the process of turning it into a Ute with the Smyth Performance kit. Now that this is done aside from some minor bodywork, we can do a little bit of work on the front end.

The car came with a dented right front fender. The right headlight was slightly damaged as well, with a broken adjuster that pointed down about two feet in front of the car. Aside from that, the standard headlights for the American Jetta are simply terrible. It was time to replace both of these parts. Since the front bumper cover has to come off for either job, I decided to do both of them at the same time.

Numerous aftermarket headlight options exist thanks to the popularity of the VW Jetta. I went with one of the more affordable options, a set of Euro-spec headlights by DNA Motoring. Not only would these work better than the original lights, the black housing would look good, and they also included the integrated fog lights that American models didn't get. To operate them I also ordered a Euro headlight switch. This also enables the parking lights to be operated separately from the headlights, like any other car on the road rather than the basic on/off switch that comes with the Jetta.

The switch arrived first and was the easiest car part I have ever installed. No tools are required. Simply push the dial in, twist it half a click clockwise, and the stock switch pulls right out. Unplug it, plug the new switch in, slide it into the dashboard, and you're done. It's so easy, and the switches are so cheap, every VW owner should have one.

They came without bulbs, so I needed to stock up on them—H4 for the high/low beam, 1156 turn signals, 194 city (parking) lights, and H3 fog lights. I plugged the new lights into the wiring harness. The headlights and turn signals worked, but the city lights and fog lights did not. Come to find out I need an additional wiring harness to enable the fog lights. That will be a future project, as well as wiring up the city lights to become the new front parking lights.

I did a great deal of searching on Car-Part.com to find a used replacement fender that didn't have a big dent in it. Since I'm eventually planning to Plastidip the whole car, I didn't have to be picky about the fender's color, or even if it had a minor scratch or two. But all of my local options were still more expensive than a brand new replacement from ECS Tuning. For $54.95, including shipping, I soon had an unblemished match for my car. It was a simple matter of unbolting the old one and bolting the new one on. Though not a factory part, it fit perfectly. I just had to swap over the turn signal from the old fender and plug it in.

Unlike the photos on ECS Tuning's web site, the fender came primed in a grey color, not black as I expected. This was not a problem, but would look ugly until I got around to the Plastidip phase of the bodywork, which may not happen before the weather in New England gets too cold. So I decided to finish what I had begun on the roof, and rattle can the remaining silver parts of the car with black primer.

I sprayed the new fender before installing it, as well as the front bumper while it was already off the car. Reassembly was the opposite of removal, just like the repair manuals always say. Then I got to work spraying the remaining portions of the doors, the driver's front fender, and the hood. I chose to leave the grill silver, the only part that remains the factory color. I figured a silver grill might add some class, or something.

A rattle can paint job is never the greatest, but keep in mind that this is not the car's final look. It's simply to make the car all one color until the real color comes along, and since the Smyth Performance kit's panels are already flat black, I simply carried the theme through to the rest of the car. Personally, I think the flat black body, along with the new headlights with black housings, looks pretty mean. Even better, I can actually see where I'm going at night, thanks to losing the original glow worm headlights.

Now that the exterior work is at a good point, it's time to do some fiddling under the hood to make the Jetta Ute work a little better. That will be our next step.

How To Meet Up With the Cannonball Memorial Run this Weekend

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The 2017 Cannonball Memorial Run is about to get underway, and I'll be riding along with two SUVs full of cops driving cross country to raise money for the families of fallen officers.

Well, that's the story, anyway.

The good news? Because this is organized by cops for cops, the route is public, the ETAs will be accurate, and everyone who wants to get behind a good cause is free to join us en route or at one of the checkpoints.

Even crazier, my fellow Cannonball outlaw Ed Bolian is also coming along.

Here's the schedule provided by organizers John Bannes & Jason Hendrix of the San Bernardino Sheriff's Department:

All Times Are Local

Thursday September 28
0800 Staging @ Santa Monica Pier
0830 Depart for Whittier PD, CA
13200 Penn St Whittier, CA 90602

0930 Arrive Whittier PD, CA
1030 Depart for San Bernardino Sheriff (SBSD) HQ
655 East 3rd Street, San Bernardino, CA 92408

1130 Arrive @ SBSD HQ
1230 Depart for Navajo Nation/Crownpoint, NM
Address TBD

2145 Arrive @ Navajo Nation/Crownpoint, NM
2230 Depart for Logan County Sheriff
216 S Broad St Guthrie OK, 73044

Friday Sept 29
0830 Arrive Logan County Sheriff - Guthrie,
0900 Depart for Tecumseh PD
109 W Washington St, Tecumseh, OK 74873

1000 Arrive @ Tecumseh PD, OK
1030 Depart for Little Elm PD
100 W Eldorado Pkwy, Little Elm, TX 75068

1300 Arrive @ Little Elm PD, TX
1600 Depart for Dallas PD HQ, TX
1400 S Lamar St, Dallas, TX 75215

1700 Arrive @ Dallas PD, TX
1800 Depart for Harris County Constable Precinct 3, TX
903 Hollywood Street, Houston, TX 77015

2200 Arrive @ Harris Co/Baytown TX
2400 Depart for East Baton Rouge Parish Sheriffs Office
14431 Airline Hwy, East Baton Rouge, LA 70817

Saturday Sept 30
0400 Arrive @ East Baton Rouge, LA
0500 Depart for Westwego PD, LA
401 4th St, Westwego, LA 70094

0645 Arrive @ Westwego PD, LA
0715 Depart for Americus PD, GA
800 GSW State University Drive, Americus, GA 31709

1400 Arrive @ Americus PD, GA
1500 Depart for Orlando PD 4:30
1250 W South St, Orlando, FL 32805

1930 Arrive @ Orlando PD
2030 Depart for NC Department of Corrections
218 Cooper Hill Road, Windsor, NC 27983

Sunday October 1st
0800 Arrive @ NC Department of Corrections
0900 Depart for VA State Police
111 E Broad St, Richmond, VA 23219

1130 Arrive @ VA State Police Richmond, VA
1230 Depart for National Law Enforcement Officers Memorial
450 F St NW, Washington, DC 20001

1430 Arrive National Law Enforcement Officers Memorial
Finish Line

I’ll be publishing live location & video updates on The Drive’s Facebook Page as connectivity allows, starting at 0830 AM PST from the start line.

Ed Bolian will be livestreaming video on the Vinwiki YouTube page.

Follow the Cannonball Memorial Run online and on Facebook.
You may donate to the Cannonball Memorial Run here.

Alex Roy is Editor-at-Large for The Drive, Host of The Autonocast, co-host of /DRIVE on NBC Sports and author of The Driver, has set numerous endurance driving records in Europe & the USA in the internal combustion, EV, 3-wheeler & Semi-Autonomous Classes, including the infamous Cannonball Run record. You can follow him on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.

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